SLEEPSONG (BoyxBoy)✔️

Chapter 140

Chapter One Hundred and Forty

I was on top of his chest.

On the floor in the hallway, he was lying on his back, neck propped up by a pillow that Diana had brought us about an hour ago before leaving us to our own devices, letting us have this time for ourselves. My head was resting comfortably against his collarbone, my hair spread out across my back like a blanket, strands of white draping down on either side and extending across the floor. His arms were locked around me beneath the frozen-looking waves, hands rubbing.

In the aftermath of my victory, I'd collapsed from a wave of unexpected exhaustion.

I didn't know where it had come from, nor had I cared, my body felt like I'd gone a thousand miles and had been completely paralyzed, too deadened to move from the weight of my own limbs. Sebastian, for whatever reason, had refused to get up or help me into the bedroom and instead had made himself comfortable right there in the middle of the hallway, just holding me.

I listened to his pulse, marveling at the differences in our bodies.

I was completely stretched out on top of him yet his legs were almost a foot longer than my own, and although my head was against his chest, his face was still so far away from mine. Being dwarfed by him made me feel smaller than I already did, but not in a bad way.

I just felt safe... so safe.

Warm, protected, and content... finally able to just grieve and let myself be comforted.

I slowly inched my heavy hands over his bare chest, hating that someone else had touched this skin. Hating that someone else had violated him, violated the man that was mine. Violated our love and our passion and our relationship, everything sacred that we were.

Because Sebastian and I, what we had... to me, it was sacred.

I treasured every single moment I was with him, treasured each second like a miracle.

He was my miracle.

He said nothing, and I said nothing, we both just lay there, basking in each other, relishing in the fact that we were finally together again the way we should have been all along.

Suddenly, he moved, shifting beneath me.

I felt no rigidness between his legs, no familiar heat, which was understandable considering the circumstances. After what he'd been through I wouldn't have been surprised if sex was off the table for the time being, and I was perfectly okay with that. I just wanted him to be okay.

To truly, completely, be okay.

"I don't think I'll ever be able to forgive myself for this," he whispered, fisting one of his hands in my hair and squeezing it. "For allowing you to suffer so badly."

"I'm fine now," I said softly.

He squeezed my body with the arm keeping me locked against him.

"You're not," he rasped, voice weaker than I was used to, but still angry and loathing and upset. "I can smell the changes that took place in you. I can smell what turned your hair white... and it makes me... ache."

His voice cracked on the last word.

"I'm fine," I dazedly repeated, far more uncertainly.

"No... no, you are not fine and it is my fault for being careless, fully and completely."

I rolled my head on a boneless neck and pressed my lips against his collarbone. His skin was nothing but scalding familiarity to me as I kissed him.

"Fine... I won't pretend," I said against him, looking at the gorgeous caramel flesh beneath me. "I won't act like I wasn't almost driven beyond a point I couldn't come back from. I was, Babe... but it wasn't your fault and I don't blame you. I blame Jasper. He's the reason I suffered, not you."