40 | Like a Knife

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𝓣ension was building rapidly in my head. My eyes were so tired and yet I couldn't sleep. There were too many questions in my mind.

Everytime I closed my eyes, I just replayed my conversation with Eros and Aries. The more I tossed and turned the more disconnected I felt from reality.

It was all too overwhelming, too far-fetched, too surreal to comprehend.

They had been following me for two years and I just couldn't get over that. I couldn't get over the fact that Eros had known me the first night I approached him, yet he acted like he didn't know me, even asked me my name which he probably already knew.

And Aries. He was the same. That first night in his club, he already knew who I was.

God, the betrayal pulsed through my veins, mingling with confusion and hurt. I just couldn't wrap my mind around their claims, their crazy cult-like past, their talk of mates and extraordinary gifts.

It feels like a twisted fantasy.

Doubt began to gnaw at my thoughts. What if they're just crazy? Delusional? Are they playing some elaborate game with my mind? I couldn't bear to trust them anymore and my heart was aching.

One step forwards, ten steps back. I'd just begun trusting Eros and now I couldn't bear it.

I missed my normal life. My friends. My family. I yearned for normalcy, for the simplicity of a life untouched by their tangled secrets.

I couldn't take this and I know there is still  more to uncover, more that will likely break me and shatter me and I'm not ready for that.

The more I sit in my room, the more the ache in my heart grows, pushing me towards a drastic decision— I need to leave.

I need to be far and away from all this madness.

I need space to process everything, to find my own truth, because Eros and Aries have shattered my trust and I can't bear the thought of being in their presence any longer. I can't bear imagining going downstairs and acting like everything is fine, like what they've been hiding from me is fine.

A part of me understands, a bigger part is furious, and the other thinks they're crazy. If I don't leave now, I might just go crazy myself. I have been here for weeks and nothing has been solved. For all I know, they're lying, making things up to keep me here.

I need to leave. I can steal one of their cars, escape to a nearby town, hide out, and figure out my next steps there, away from the chaos they've thrust upon me.

Quietly, I opened my door, standing by it for a few seconds as I listened for any sounds of life, but all was dark and silent. My footsteps were small and cautious as I navigated the hall, the stairs, because I didn't want to get caught.

Somehow, I made it downstairs and found refuge in the garage. Jesus, there are so many expensive looking cars here. Lucky for me,  I found a set of keys and I'm thankful because I'm sure if I'd given the Blackwell brothers any indication that I planned to leave, they wouldn't have been so careless.

Clutching them tightly in my trembling hands, I searched for the car the keys belonged to. When I heard a click, I ran towards the car.  Without a thought, I started it, desperate to leave the turmoil in my mind behind.

The engine roared to life and I felt more anxious than before. I didn't know if they had heard it, but I felt time like a relentless force, pressing against my every thought and action. I pulled out of the garage feeling a mixture of determination and heartache.

The gates of their estate approached me and so did one of their guards. His attempts to stop me became distant echoes as I pushed the pedal down, my foot heavy with resolve. I was leaving and nothing was stopping me.

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