Heaven in Hell

ROSHESH-II

RECAP:

Prescott finds a video clip from the data access link of Aarham's facility where Roshesh, in a malice filled voice re-affirms to a henchmen that 'All men have weaknesses. Including Agent Prescott'. This results in Prescott angrily disowning Roshesh and Chief, through torture, trying to mend their relationship. 

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ROSHESH'S POV (Contd.):

I get myself up with an effort that an old man would need to take a hard shit. Pathetic, I know!

Disgusted with myself for needing ORS to fucking stand, I contemplate pushing through. But first step off that table and I feel the room spinning. Laying back down, I grit my teeth and chug the whole thing down. This is not for me. This is to earn his trust back. Right now, his needs are more important than my guilt or punishment.

Even with the ORS, I feel completely drained, empty. The burning pain feels like I'm on fire and while it hurts as hell, it serves as a constant reminder of what I have done.

As I stand in attention, making one arm press on a portion of the stomach wound , I say "Sir, I'm ready" and desperately hope that tears do not leak out of my eyes.

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To avoid telling the team about what really happened in that room, I pushed through in all exercises ignorning the due care required for my wound. However, I would invariably end up requiring a new dressing every 6 hours and shit ton of proteins to keep going.

Unfortunately, if I went to mom, she would move heaven and earth to get an answer. And let's not even start with the consequences. My only option was Dad.

Every 6 hours, it would him and me in that room back again with silence as our trusted companion. I would try to not be a baby about the wound and find words to apologize to him. I wish I could do better than a billion sorries.

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"Crawl" 

It is post dinner and I feel like puking more than before. I need proteins, the fastest of which is raw eggs with milk, and that very same disgusting thing is a disaster recipe if you hear an order like this.  

Shit. I'm truly fucked. Crawling on a wound like this is worse than death. Opening my mouth to umm.. never mind, I close it again. I do not think I'm in any position to say anything. If this is his way of punishment, he knows better. I'll just have to accept it. 

Taking deep breaths and trying not to shudder, I drop to a half-plank and convince my fast-beating heart to just lay down on my stomach. Come on, Roshesh, it can't be too bad. Besides, I'm the expert at taking a hard one. 

"Not you, Officer. Get up" What? Oh man, thank God. I-I-mean, I deserved it but it would have been pure burning agony. I am already sweating thinking about it. 

With Dad and the team crawling, I remain standing, growing more embarrassed at being singled out. Maybe I'm the weakest link in this team. Right fucking now, there is no maybe. I'm.

"Roshesh, Squats" Ignoring the raging storm growing in me, I get down to it careful not to touch any of my wounds. I have to earn his trust back, even if it tears me down and for that, I need a quick recovery.

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My legs are shaking and vision disoriented but I keep at it. The team is in no better shape than me. Even fully clothed, crawls are not easy on your body.

"Prescott, keep moving. Rest of the team, up. Dismissed."  

Am I part of this dismissed team? Unsure, I pause mid-squat contemplating if I should risk asking, stopping or even breathing wrong.