Losing control

Gideon

Morgan knew it would hit Spencer and Dave the hardest when Gideon died. He had driven Reid up to the cabinet and then spend him comfort throughout the day. He was asked by Dave and Stephen to help him clean out the cabinet a few weeks later packing everything in boxes before stuff gets stolen. There was no way to keep this cabinet watched. They was hardly a phone signal so no hope for security cameras.

"Morgan if you are comfortable I would like you to start in the room over there Its full of files and work stuff, I don't really wanna open something and look at pictures from a corpse." Stephen asks him and Morgan does what he was asked.

And eventhough it felt weird going through Gideons stuff, since he had worked with the very private man for years he still was glad he could be a help.

He sorts files that Gideon shouldn't even have in his private cabinet in one box so they could be brought back to the FBI and private Stuff in another until he found a stack of files and papers he was going to throw on the private stack till he realized that the name on it was "Spencer Reid.".

Immediately he takes the sheets back out and looked through them. These are medical bills, protocols, test result everything from Spencer. Some of them from long after he had left. And the next stack are numerous writings and e-mails exchanges with doctors that Morgan had never seen before eventhough he is the one who is the most informed about Spencer's condition and treatments. He is, so he thought, the one who Spencer trusts with this and who has copies from everything keeping everything organized.

"You okay?" Rossi came in looking like he just had cried.

"Yeah,yeah just- Its fine, are you?"

"Can you drive the first car to the storage?"

"Of course." He takes all of the files regarding Spencer and shoves them onto the passager seat of his car and only comes back to them when JJ asks him to give him a ride a few days later.

"What's all of this?"

"Oh don't worry." He grabs the stack so JJ can sit down and than places it on her lap. "It's Spencer's medical file."

"And you keep that in your car because?"

"I found it in Gideon's cabinet."

"Oh."

"Yeah, it's updated, and I mean nearly every update and there are exchanges between Gideon and doctors. Not only national ones." Sceptical JJ goes through a few of them.

"I can't believe Spencer didn't tell us he was in contact with Gideon again." They make the decision that JJ is going to talk to him about it. She invites him over for coffee and when Will and Henry went to pick up some grocerys she takes her chance. "Listen,I am not mad at you but why didn't you tell us you were having contact with Gideon again?"

"What?"

"Morgan found your medical records in his cabinet, and not only old ones." Confused Spencer looks at JJ for a moment. "You didn't know?"

"No, I haven't spoken to him in years." They share an uncomfortable silence till Spencer dares to ask again. "How much of my medical records had he?"

"Everything. Morgan compared it to the ones you have and there is nearly nothing missing."

They decide to address this at the round table and while the three really thought it was Garcia's doing they were surprised it was Hotch's. "I was the one sending him this files. He contacted me three weeks after the left asking to be informed about your health and nothing else so I updated him whenever I could and copied your bills from the hospital and everything I could get my hands on."

"You went through my desk?"

"Yes."

"You have been in contact with him this whole time?"

"Yes. But it was only in writing and short calls when you were admitted to the hospital. We never discussed any work nor any thing else about you or something else. He would hang up the moment I tried." Apologetic he looks at Reid who doesn't say anything for a while. "He worried about you."

"Apparently not enough to stay or seek help from us for his last case." They don't talk about it till Hotch and him were alone in a old file room in Pennsylvania a few weeks later. "Did he ever considered coming to visit?"

"Who?"

"Gideon."

"I don't know. I called him when you were shot in the neck but when I told him you were going to be okay he hung up."

"Do you really think he worried?"

"Yes. He was always searching for someone to help you. Dr. Pennigton three years back, that was his idea." Spencer's expression immediately changed. "What's wrong?"

"He was at the hospital."

"What?"

"I passed out in the corridor, he helped me up and I thought I was just delusional." Spencer was on his way to the cafeteria, to just see something different for a few minutes, when he had passed out not far from his room and a man had helped him into a seating position and stocked his hair back. "He said 'Oh Spence, look at you' and then he- he moved my curls out of my face and then I passed out again, so I thought, I thought I dreamt it because when I woke up he was gone."