Shadow Kissed

Chapter 60

Flashbacks of yesterday fell into my head.

"Sarah! You have to stop revolving your life around this one boy. Look what he is doing to you"

"What are you talking about mum? I haven't revolved my life around him. I have made my life better because of him. You wouldn't understand."

I look away as the anger filled into the deepest parts of my mind. I wanted to scream or yell or fill everything with heavy noises and sounds.

"You haven't made you life better, your failing classes, going to parties, drinking alcohol, you never come to church with Max and I. You never talk to Travis. And I bet you are even doing pot too." She grabs my chin aggressively and tilts it up. "I bet your stoned right now"

"Mum, let go of me. Your hurting me." I throw her hands away from me. I massage my chin as she looks at me with a massive serious face.

"You really think that about me. You think I'm a fucking teenager who drinks and does pot. Well I'm not. I don't come to church because I have to study. I just don't dot pot mum. I don't drink ever. I have been to one party mum. One fucking party."

"Excuses, excuses" she blabs.

I go on. "And I'm failing classes because your too busy snogging your soon to be husband. You tell me to not revolve my life around one guy yet your engaged to this guy you have been going out with for like, I don't know about only 3-4 months."

She was cut down. She didn't know what to say. She didn't have anything to say.

All of a sudden, all the anger was gone and the guilt rushed over me. It was like a tsunami. A tsunami full of guilt.

"Mum, I didn't mean it l..." I start off as I try to grab her hand.

"No, no. It had to be heard." She pulled her hand away from mine and walked out of the room. Tears filled my eyes.

That was the last time I saw her.

"What about my mother?" I asked the doctor as she slowly walked towards me.

All different conclusions rushed into my head. Everything was branching off into smaller and smaller conclusions. There were so many I couldn't shake them out of my head.

"She has been in a car accident" my heart dropped. I could feel tears filling up my eyes. I couldn't see. My vision was so blurry. The only way was to blink.

I blink and they come pouring out.

"There. There." The doctor says as she puts her hand on my back. She rubs it up and down.

I focus on my breathing. Beat. Beat. Beat. Beat. It's going so fast that my breathing is getting heavy too.

"Is she..." I couldn't finish it. I didn't want to know. I just couldn't.

The doctor knew exactly what I was thinking. "Y-" she pronounced the first letter of the word and I broke down.

My mum cant be gone. I can't. She cant be gone. I need her. She is my mum. They lady who have birth to me. The one who taught me how to ride a bike. The one who did my hair in the mornings.

I cant do this. I cant do this.

I quickly jump up out of the bed and ran out to the court yard.

My stomach hurts so much as I cry and cry. The doctor did follow me. I couldn't deal with her right now but she is nearly all I have left.

Max! What's going to happen with Max? No! No!