Starman | BTS 8th Member | *ੈ✩‧₊˚(editing)

20.

It was dark already. The sun was once again hiding behind the buildings. I sighed getting on the bus. I found a seat the back where i could listen to my music in peace. I pressed shuffle and quickly closed my eyes. Thinking.

The bus reached the stop and i scrambled off. I was the last person and it was night time. Not many people were going here, it's a quiet street i guess.
I ran upstairs, fumbling around in my pocket for keys.My hands shook as i opened the door.Homey air. Warm air.
My heart soared. I smiled absentmindedly. But in the air, i could sense unhappiness tainting the house. Bookshelves shaped the room. Fat spined books crammed on to the shelves, picture frames decorated surfaces and plants were silhouetted in the Windows.

Peace.

My hands traced the books as i wondered to jeewoos room.I looked around. Mums room at the end. The bathroom, dowoons, then my old room. I felt a sadness, that things would never be normal. It took 5 years to get to a sort of normal again. But with me not here, I'm surprised my hair inst grey.I knocked on the door, waiting for movement. I heard a shuffling and a groan.

"J-jisung" jeewoo looked shocked.

"Yeah" i said looking at him simply.

"You did come" he smiled tears shining in his eyes.

"You doubted me?" I chuckled. Jeewoo ushed me into the living room so we could sit and talk

"I wanted to check up on you" i sighed taking a seat opposite him."Sorry for the inconvenience" he murmured fiddling with the strings of his hoodie.

"Family is never an inconvenience," I said flatly.

"Family is important" He bit the inside of his cheek, a family habit, that jeewoo did more than any of us.

"And so is health" I looked at his pale features. His face was fin, abnormal. It had seemed like he hadn't smiled in days.

"You haven't been eating properly" He grimaced.

"I was just hoping dowoon gets enough food and is safe..." He trailed off.I sighed and shook my head.

"I know you worry about money. But money shouldn't be your concern. You are no use to dowoon when you're sick." I said softly. He grimaced, his lower lip shaking slightly.

"I'm just so stressed" jeewoo broke. Tears now streaming down his face. I got up and sat beside him.

"Its gonna be okay. It's not gonna be as bad as before" i said softly pulling him into a hug.

"I-i know" he sobbed.

"But I'm paranoid. I just want dowoon to be okay." He whispered.

"He's at an after school club.
I wanted him to take up a thing he'd enjoy. And at this time id usually, be working I didn't want him in the house by himself." Jeewoo sniffed into my shoulder.My heart dropped. He's too paranoid. He hasn't been eating properly at all. I needed him to understand that he was safe. After a while, he stopped crying and had calmed down.

"Right. You're gonna listen to me." I took him by his shoulders and guided him to the dining table. I planted him down in a seat. My phone started ringing, but I simply cancelled the call without looking at the id. I needed to focus on jeewoo.

"Right." I smiled as he looked up at me his eyes red.

"Cut down hours at work." I said going into the kitchen. He nodded wordlessly.

"So you can eat and not stress" I took down some noodles and started looked at the fridge. I smiled slightly. He had stocked it up. I was surprised that he even placed an onion in there which I knew he despised but only ate them because mum told him to.