Too much

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You laid next on Severus's lap on the couch as he sat, reading his newspaper and drinking coffee. You enjoyed this time, just him and you who were slowly falling asleep, content on his lap.

"Would you like to move to bed?" Severus asked, putting down his paper and looking at you, slowly running his fingers through your hair.

"Yeah" you said, getting up and stretching slightly. "Love you Severus" you said, pulling him into a hug.

"I love you also Li-(y/n)" he said, stumbling at the mistake and grimacing slightly, hoping you hadn't heard the mistake. But you had and you slumped your arms, not hugging him anymore. Severus had made this mistake countless times and every time he did it made you feel worse and more and more like a replacement, that Severus was using you and was really still in love with Lily. Tears started to spring in your eyes, your thoughts went over and over about how Severus did not love you and if Lily was still alive he would want to be with her, not you.

Severus heard these gentle sniffles and had no idea what to do. He felt so bad for his mistake, he knew how many times he did not mean it. As Severus was thinking, your sniffles went to racking tears, crying against Severus' chest, wetting his robes.

"(y/n)?" he asked, stroking your back.

"Oh so now you get it right" you muttered through your crying, trying to pull away from Severus but he held you to him.

"I apologize" he said. "I do this often and I do not mean it"

"It shows you don't love me" you whispered.

"on the country love" he gently said. "I feel happy and safe with you like I did with Lily, this life is what I imagined it would be with her." he sighed. "I never wish to hurt you with my words, but I fear I have"

You didn't know what to say so just close your eyes and let your head rest against Severus' chest, feeling his gentle heart beat.

"Will you promise not to call me her name again?" you asked.

"Of course" he said quietly.

"Thank you" you whispered, carrying on leaning into Severus and sniffing his scent which calmed you.

You and he stood there for some time, Severus slowly rocking you side to side while you leaned against him, your eyes closed. You started to giggle and Severus looked down confused, raising one eyebrow in interest.

"If you do it again do I have permission to tickle you?" you asked, sniggering slightly.

"What?" Severus asked, confused as you started to tickle him. "I am not ticklish little one" he mused, smirking slightly. You pouted at that which made Severus chuckle and pull you tighter into a hug. "I love you my (y/n)" he said, picking you up and laying you down on the bed. You smuggled under the covers and he joined you, hugging you close to him.

"Good night my precious (y/n)" he whispered, kissing your cheek softly.

"Good night Severus" you answered, sighing in happiness as you both fell asleep.

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