But It Isn't Right (Duskwood Fanfic)

Reckoning

With the things I did not do
I lost myself
Misplaced or confused?
For why I am here,
if it is just to cry
So, I create stories in my mind
And do my time

This poem is part of a collection called "Between Heart and Soul" by an author here on Wattpad, TalleFey. You can read the full book here:  https://www.wattpad.com/story/258146700-between-heart-and-soul

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I was told later that I spent two weeks in the hospital. I say I was told because I mostly lay motionless and didn't speak, the world around me meaningless to my ears. As soon as they were allowed, Richy, Dan, and Jessy occupied my room. Despite the nurses' protests about visiting hours, Richy crammed himself into the tiny bed with me every night. If they tried to make him leave, they said that I shrieked and tried to pull out my IV. After the second bloody mess and running out of good spots to stick my arms or hands, they relented and allowed him to stay. Jessy and Dan took turns being with me during the day, with Dan usually having to drag Richy away so that he would shower and change clothes.

Jessy sat with me and didn't try to get me to talk. She knew what was wrong and couldn't fix it. She worked on a laptop, familiarizing herself with my social media accounts. Over the past several weeks, a lot had happened that needed to be caught up on.

This time, they let me do the cardiac rehab as an outpatient and released me quickly. I think they were sick of having three extra people living in my hospital room.

At home, the loft was completely fixed up. My friends had erased all traces of Phil's destruction. I spent a lot of time sleeping and drifting. Richy stayed by my side through it all. He spoke quietly, touched and held me gently as if he thought I would crumble away beneath his fingers. 

Then one day, I woke up. Richy was asleep facing me. Even in sleep, his face was creased with worry, and there were hollows under his eyes. He had several days' worth of stubble on his face, and his hair was longer and stuck up all over the place. I leaned forward and placed a feather-light kiss on his lips. My fingers traced all the lines on his face that hadn't been there that long ago.

Richy opened his eyes, and they widened from seeing me look at him for the first time since that day. "Li."

"The ghost of Li, at your service," I replied in a creaky voice. I cupped his face. "I'm sorry--"

"No apologies," he insisted. I leaned forward and kissed him, and he did that humming sound that I loved. I smiled and drew him closer. My lips went to his cheeks and found they were wet with tears.

"Oh, Richy." He wrapped his arms tightly around me, and I held him just as closely as his body shook. Now it was time for me to take care of him. He had done enough for me. I held him, running my fingers through his hair and kissing his face until he was calm. "Come on. Let's go have some breakfast."

I took his hand and led him to the kitchen. Jessy and Dan were sitting at the counter. They both stared, wide-eyed, as Richy followed me in. Jessy looked at Richy's tear-stained face with sympathy, but she grinned and winked at me. "Welcome back," she said.

I tried to get Richy to sit with them while I made him food, but he wanted to be behind me, his arms wrapped around my waist, face pressed against mine. That was alright. I liked feeling the stubble on my cheek and kept turning to kiss him.