ALPHA CYRUS

Chapter 10

CARMELA THOMPSON

"Could you bring these papers to Mr. Steele and have them signed?" I looked up to find Ms. McCarthy, my trainer, looking at me with a worried look.

I sighed as I put my pen down. I nodded at her and took the papers from her. She looked at me for awhile. I can tell that she wants to ask me something but when I avoided her gaze, she just left without saying anything.

I knew this would happen. Sooner or later, I knew I will speak to him, but for work at least. Trying my best to put on a poker face, I walked my way towards his office and gave myself a minute before knocking.

"Come in." I heard him say.

I struggled a little as I am holding quite a lot of papers but I managed to open the door eventually. My eyes immediately fell on him and he's busy with his laptop. He didn't say a word nor looked at me as I stepped inside and again, the pang in my chest didn't go unnoticed.

Clearing my throat, I said, "Ms. McCarthy wanted you to sign these, Mr. Steele." I said as I walked towards his table, leaving the papers on top of it, beside his laptop.

I heard him sigh. Keeping his eyes off his laptop then to me. I immediately looked away, afraid that if I looked a little longer, I might cry for whatever reason I could make up so instead of making myself look like a fool, I decided to just looked down with my hands clasped together.

He started signing the papers and I'm sure it won't take just a few minutes so I decided to just go away and leave him alone--like what he wished and asked of me before.

"May be, I should just come back for the papers." I said. As I turned around and took a step towards the door, he stopped me, like he always did.

"No. Just wait for it." He said with full authority yet it sounded like a plea at the same time. 

Shrugging off that impossible thought, I closed my eyes and sighed deeply. Nodding my head, I turned to find him looking at me.

His eyes, darn those eyes. They always have something I cannot decipher. A set of emotion that confuses me every single time I catch them digging holes into my own ones.

I cleared my throat and that kind of pulled him back to his senses. He then went through the papers and I am growing impatient standing here, waiting for him to finish everything that will surely take at least ten minutes.

I can't stand being in his office, breathing the same air, because the more I stay with him, the more I think about what happened that night. My mind keeps reminding me of that kiss we shared. Of how excited I became when he asked me to kiss him back. How my skin melted from his touch. How he said I was his that made me think, yeah, I am yours but what I cannot forget the most is how my heart broke when he gave me that look.

The look that told me everything he felt. That everything was a mistake. A mistake he didn't want and he will never repeat. As much as I wanted to leave him and take a hold of my pride that night, I had no choice but to ride with him.

The woods he had brought me was far and it felt like we drove for three days because of the silence between us. Neither of us talked during the ride and the silence was deafening. After he dropped me home, I cried again, just like the first time I cried for him. I cried myself to sleep but unlike the first heartache, I showed up in his company.

I came the next morning like nothing happened and went on with my life as his secretary. From then on, I never talked to him unless it was about work. I only greeted him and he would just look at me and then leave.

For almost a week now, it has always been like that and I keep telling myself that it is how things work. It is how things are done and are supposed to be so I should act like it. Like a professional and keep my personal feelings all to myself. But, I have to keep the kiss off my mind too, which is giving me a hard time to be honest.