𝐕𝐄𝐍𝐆𝐄𝐀𝐍𝐂𝐄 [18+]

54: Their Rift

My country for some reason thought it would be cool to ban pinterest. If I say I am FUMING, it would an understatement.

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Okay I feel good now.

"Is falling in love with someone's story the same thing as falling in love with the person himself?"

— Ally Condie (Matched (Matched, #1)

Marienne's POV:

Love, eternity, destiny......

I always found those words overrated, a creation of deluded minds. Those words were myths for me, as unreal as beautiful dreams.

That was until I met Madeline.

Madeline Quarsiekiev, I met her in kindergarten. She was the most beautiful girl in our class. I met her when I was coping with my parent's loss. I truly believed that she was an angel who was sent from up above to soothe my wounds that was deeply embedded into my soul.

I proposed to her when I was 19 and she just turned 18. We had gone through a long hurt-comfort relationship; after we finally decided to give into each other.

The thing is, no matter what I did, or how I behaved, deep down I always cared for her. I always loved her and I never cheated on her.

For me, that one unpardonable thing in a relationship is cheating.

And she ended up doing just that.

I was shattered into pieces, I was broken. I believed that I could never trust anyone ever again.

The feeling of being watched, the feeling of someone whispering behind my back- it never faded away. I took medicines to numb those feelings. Sleeping pills don't work for me anymore, all they do is numb my body.

I felt numb and when I wasn't feeling numb, I felt broken. Anger was a foreign emotion to me now.

Anger represents the spirit to fight, the spirit to survive. My survival spirit had died down long ago, I was just now an empty shell, full of grief and pain.

It almost felt like I was at the end of my fight against my demons, I was only waiting for them to take over this new medication, just like my other meds, compel me to harm myself until I withered away.

But then, I found out that I was going to be a father. I was going to father a child along with a woman I had believed to be my cheater fiancée's murderer.

And a child who was the result of a night none of us remembered.

I didn't know how to feel. I didn't know what to do.

So many feelings if they counted, but none if I ignored all of them and went back to living like a shell.

But this was something that could not be ignored. I was going to be a father.

It scared me, it terrified me. I hated feeling like this. I didn't know what to do. I did wish to be a father someday, but-

I didn't wish to be like my dad.

Or any of my parents. I didn't exactly have the best role models growing up.

And there was Rose.

Every pore of my body seethed with unadulterated anger; the emotion I thought was long forgotten; as I remembered her words.

We are so much alike.