Bulletproof

46.

Heyy so I'm sorry for being an ass with updating but I've had a hella busy week and now on Tuesdays and Thursdays I tutor someone so updates will either be late or not on Tuesdays or Thursdays.

46. I Loved You Through Everything, And You Don't Even Care.

I sob into my hands as I sit on the floor of my living room. Nothing feels right and the pain in my chest is nearly unbearable. I stare at my phone that lays across the room as it illuminates in the darkness. I can't make out the name, but I have a feeling it's either Aus-Carter or his friends. 

I can't even call him Austin anymore, Austin wouldn't of cheated, but Carter would have. That wasn't my Austin, it couldn't of been. 

"Fuck" I sob, wiping away at my tears. I shouldn't be crying, he's not worth it, if he has the nerve to not even think twice about cheating on me, he's not worth my tears. 

I walk over and pick up my phone, seeing a text from Zach. But before I could read it, my front door bursts open and Carter in the door way.

"Get the fuck out" I grit, but he ignores me and walks closer. I back away with each step he takes until I'm backed into a wall.

"Brogan" He whispers.

"Fuck you" I growl and he draws in shaky breath.

"Please listen to me" He begs.

"No! You fucking cheated! Not to even mention it was with Ella!" I scream.

"But Baby I didn't mean it, I didn't want it to happen I didn't know what I was doing" He cries and I nearly give in seeing him cry, but pictures of him and Ella flood my mind and my anger only intensifies.

"What do you mean you didn't know what you were doing? How do you not know that you're fucking someone who isn't your fucking girlfriend?" 

"I don't know but Brogan please we can get through this!" He pleads.

"No we can't! I can't forgive you!" I scream "I loved you through everything, and you don't even care" I cry, tears blurring my vision.

"I do care!"

"If you did you wouldn't of cheated on me" I grit "Have fucking fun in LA, I hope I never have to see you again" 

"Brogan don't say that"

"Too late" I shrug "Now get out" I point to the door but he doesn't move "Get out!" I scream, and he nods slightly, and turns on his heels walking out of my house. When the door slams shut behind him, I fall to my knees for many more long hours of crying.

|||

"Brogan!" My mom calls from downstairs "Honey, you have to eat something' She says and I hear her footsteps coming up the stairs. She knocks on my door, before opening it and sitting on the edge of my bed "Honey, I know it hurts but it'll get better"

"Will it mother? Will it really?" I groan, and she rubs my leg.

"Yes it will, how about we have a girls day today? Just me and you" She suggests, and I can almost hear the gut wrenching sympathetic smile on her face.

"Sure mom, just let me get out of my cozy bed to put on clothes so I can go out in public so everyone can pity me because I look like death" I sarcastically reply.

"There's that sarcasm I love" She retorts.

"Learned from the best" I sneer.

"Okay, so are you agreeing or not?"

"Sure" I roll my eyes "You need to get out, I'm naked under all my clothes" 

"You're an ass" My mom chuckles, patting my leg before walking out of my room. I get out of bed and walk to my closet, I throw on a black hoodie over my sports bra and pull on a pair of shorts. I walk out of my room after sliding on a pair of flip flops and meet my mom at the door.

"Where do you want to go?"

"I don't know, this was your idea" I roll my eyes.

"How about Chuck E. Cheese?" She suggests.

"Yes, because watching snotty nosed five year olds brings me such great joy, I can't think of anything better" I sneer and she chuckles.

"You're a shit when you're sad"

"And you're shit all the time" I shrug and she scoffs.

"I want 4 McDonalds Sundaes" 

"Why 4?"

"Because it seems like a reasonable number" I shrug "I want 3 caramel and 1 chocolate"

"No, just because you're single doesn't mean I'm going to let you get fat" For some reason, her words trigger tears in my eyes and before I can stop them they spill over "Aw Brogs, why are you crying?" Her calling me 'Brogs' only makes me sob harder as I lean my head against the window of the car "I'm sorry" She says frantically, swerving into a McDonalds.

"I don't want them" I sob "He cheated on me because I was fat" 

"No he didn't, don't say that" She sighs.

"Yes he did mom, he thought I was fat and ugly" I cry, sobbing into my hands.

"He would never do that"

"You lie because he did!" 

"Okay, maybe this was a bad idea" My mom mutters.

"What? Are you going to cheat on me too? Find a daughter that's better and skinnier than me?" 

"No, that's not even close to what I'm going to do" She frowns, shaking her head.

I stay relatively quiet after that, besides my sobs you don't hear a peep out of me until we wind down a very familiar road.

"Where are we going?"

"I'm going to prove you weren't cheated on because you were fat" 

"But ma-"

"Not buts about it"

"How do you know where he lives?"

"A mother knows everything" She smirks and soon enough we're parked in front of his house. The place gives me a sick and eery feeling knowing what I walked in on the other day, but to say I'm thankful his car is gone is an understatement.

"Mom, what's today's date?" I ask.

"August 20th"

"Mom! He's gone! He left for LA yesterday" I sob even harder and she looks at me in confusion.

"What?"

"He got into UCLA and now he's gone" I shakily reply, I had spent so many days moping around I hadn't even realized that his move in day is tomorrow, he's going to be in California all happy, while I'm still here in Miami, wondering what could've been between us.

And damn, does it suck.

:::

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Love,

Bad_Boy_Hemmo