Sumanika ~ The Prince's Widowed Bride

45 ~ Walking Away

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Suman POV

And pulled my hand from his.

"I want to go home, Kunwarsa,"

I stood up from there and wiped the tears.

His voice turned hoarse. "Oh, Okay,"

He said, and I looked at him, washing his tears and walked towards Ashwait.

My heart felt as if I was caught in between a storm. A storm of life. A storm of pain and love.

He helped me get on the horse and climbed behind me.

The ride back to the Kingdom was silent, and the moment I stepped down from the horse, I turned to get back to my chamber.

But he held my hand and stopped me.

I tried not to cry and looked at his red eyes.

"Are you okay? Suman,"

He asked in a slow voice, licked his lips, and I gulped silently, breaking from inside.

"I need time, Kunwarsa,"

I managed to say slowly, and he nodded, leaving my hand.

I did not know, but hearing all this from his mouth felt more brutal. I knew, I always knew he had a past, and it would filled with women. This was something I could not say that I was not expecting.

I did expect it from him, but it hurt me more to know.

I came back to my room and sat down on the mattress, bringing my knees to my chest and cried. It felt painful. I felt hurt and betrayed.

I did not know why.

My heart felt heavy, and I let the fresh tears roll down my eyes. There was a strange weight appearing on my chest, and I felt unable to take that off.

Why the hell did he tell me all of this?

I hope he never told me.

I mean, I could understand what he had gone through because all my life, I was running from one thing to another, too, and lost hope in people.

But why like this?

And the moment he said that he had lost his parts in the past and they would never be back, it sliced my heart.

I did not know what to do now.

I closed my eyes and burst into silent cries. I did not even know why exactly I was crying.

I laid back and hid myself under the comforter. His words were circling my head. I knew I would not be first or second, but I did not want to know it. I did not know what to say to him.

We were not in love, so why was it hurting so bad? It broke even more when I got to know about my husband sleeping with another woman.

Kunwarsa did not cheat on me; he did not even look at any other woman after me and told me everything about his past, but it still hurt.

I did not know, but there was something happening in my chest; I was feeling as if the history would repeat itself. I was feeling as if another, even more brutal pain was awaiting me.

I did not know how to trust him. What if he would sleep with another woman again for some information? What if he fell in love with someone and went to a brothel again?

What if I could not satisfy him like I could not do my husband?

I shook my head and washed my tears away. My head started to hurt, and I closed my eyes, trying to calm myself.