Positive | ✓

[26] Positive

~*~*~*~Lily's POV~*~*~*~

Chapter 26

 "Does it look like I am replacing him?" I asked Casey hastily, as I paced the grounds of the school's oval.

"Err-"

 "He actually thinks that I have given up on him!" I continued fretting, not even letting Casey answer.

"Lily-"

"And I am not good enough for him! What the hell was that about anyway? And what was that crap about asking me out on a date? He never asked me out at all, he just asked about my weekend... How was I supposed to know what he meant? It's not like he gives clear signals-"

"LILY!" Casey shouted cutting me off on my rant, "If you don't stop I can't help you."

I groaned pathetically as I slouched to the ground, lying on the recently mown grass. Casey and I decided to come out onto the oval for lunch to get away from anyone, more specifically for us to talk about Cory without being over heard. My mind was still buzzing from questions and I wanted more than anything was to find the answer. That's why I wanted Casey's help, but I wasn't giving her much of a chance when I kept ranting like I was.

"Help me, please," I pleaded to her, wanting to finally end this.

She paused for a moment, probably thinking of what to say, "Lily, I can't answer all these questions. This is between Cory and yourself and nobody else. I am not saying that it's your fault but it isn't all of Cory's."

That was something I couldn't deny.  As much as I wanted to say it wasn't any of my fault, but it was. I made him feel this way, I made him feel rejected and most of all I hurt him. The thought of hurting him was almost unbearable, it made my gut churn. What was I becoming?

"Casey, tell me how to fix this."

She gave me a sympathetic smile and pulled me into a tight hug. It was all she could really do for me at the moment, and somehow I found myself crying more and more. I had screwed everything up, and for what? That was the big question that my mind had not come to the conclusion yet.

"Are you hungry?" Casey asked me handing me a packet of chips.

I smiled and took them gratefully. I hadn't eaten anything today as I had overslept.

"Don't blame yourself too much. Cory isn't helping this at all either," she tried to comfort me, but it didn't work.

"I just wish he would tell me this stuff. If I would have known he asked me out I would have never had gone on that date with-"

"No regrets," Casey cut me off using her quote.

"It's not that easy Casey... I am a living regret! I regret going to that party, I regret getting drunk. I regret having bloody sex with Cory Peterson and I regret my stupid life... I regret everything!"

Casey gave me an annoyed look before getting up and walking away.

"Wait. Where are you going?" I asked getting up to follow her, but she just quickened her pace.

I continued to follow her, "Casey wait!"

"What do you want to hear from me Lily?! To say everything will be fine, that life is perfect. I know you are going through hell right now, but don't you dare try and tell me that you regret everything. Life isn't easy but you got to stick with it, and go with it no matter what issues it throws at you, but you know what Lily? You are acting gutless. Stop regretting everything and hoping it would go back to normal, it happened so face it. Now move on with your life and deal with the problems in the present not the bloody past!" she shouted at me before walking off leaving me standing alone absolutely frozen on the middle of the oval... feeling rather shattered.