Don't Speak (SBI Angst)

3

Technoblades POV:

"Sorry if I barged in on an important conversation I heard you guys talking." In reality I only heard tommy speaking, but that's to be expected

"Yeah! I was just asking Wilbur basic questions to get to know him better, he has a notebook he writes with!"

Hi Wilbur wrote with a small wave

I wave back, "anything interesting you found out?" I direct to tommy

"Yeah! He can sing and can play guitar, obviously he doesn't sing in front of others and he hasn't been able to play his guitar for awhile since something happened to it at an old home but I think we should get him a guitar and hear him play!"

"Really?" I look at Wilbur "I hope one day we can hear your songs" Wilbur nods

(A/N idk why writing one day and song in the same sentence made me think about Wilbur's literal song one day, if you haven't heard it you should listen to it AND FOLLOW LOVEJOYY)

"I'm hungry" starts tommy"im gonna grab a snack it's not lunch time yet, want anything Wilbur? Tech?" Wilbur shakes his head and I say "can you get me a glass of water please, thanks Toms" he hums in agreement and shuts the door behind him

"Sorry if tommy was a bit much or anything for you, you might even find him annoying at first actually."

No no! He was nice to talk to I swear :)

"That's good, he can be loud when meeting new people and eventually when he's close enough to you it's easier for him to put down that mask and be calmer, even emotional sometimes."

I think him being loud is a good way to take a break from everyone being serious and such yk?

"Yeah. I'm surprised he only really has 2 good friends that aren't family related, tubbo and ranboo, he probably brought them up, he met them when he first moved here and tubbo had shut some pricks up about how he was adopted while ranboo kinda was an echo behind him, ranboo goes unoticed a lot but you can tell he likes it that way."

Wilbur simply nods and reaches slightly for his pen before the door opened harshly and he stopped, his flinching didn't go unnoticed.

"OKAY! I got your water techno, I got me some crisps, and I know you didn't want anything wil but I got you a pack of fruit snacks just Incase your hungry later!" Wilbur gives a small nod as to say thank you, and I notice he was a small bit more tensed then before, I don't think Tommy noticed tho he seemed to engaged with his chips(ik tommy called them crisps but Tommy's from the UK and technos from the US and I deadass have no idea where this is set so akhsjansns)

I look at Wilbur and mouth 'you okay?' he just nods and reaches for his notebook, thinking for a second before he begins to write

I'll be right back, I gotta use the loo (A/N as an American it hurts to write loo fr)

Wilbur POV

I sit up and head for the restroom Phil had showed me earlier for my "shower" I mean, I did shower but that wasnt the main reason I was in there.

I lock the door behind me, I left the Altoids box in my room knowing that it would be an immediate give away if I grabbed it right in front of them. I as slowly as possible open a drawer under the sink and see a package of razors, opened, score.

I pick up one from the package and glide the sharp edge across my wrist, little dots of blood surfacing before eventually becoming a line. Not good enough. I press a little harder for the second cut and it is a line almost immediately, I do the same pressure up my wrist to my elbow and grab some toilet paper to dab against the cuts.

It's gotta have been about 10 minutes by now, I flush the bloody paper and the blade down the toilet and roll down my sweater sleeve before walking out and back into to room.

"Why were you in there so long" mentions techno, looking suspicious. I brush it off.

"Maybe he just needed to shit tech, no shame in it- OW WHAT THE FUCK TECHNO-" "stop cursing first of all, you know Phil hates when you cuss because your only 13. And second of all you don't just say that to someone you just met!" Techno retaliates "okay well Anna literally FELL IN LOVE with someone she just met, a whole god damn song about it, but I can't say that he shit?" "Did you forget what happens to Anna? When was the last time you watched frozen?" "Okay that was a bad example." Tommy gives up.

I sit In my original spot and write in the notepad

Sorry I took so long

"Your good Wilbur don't worry-"

"BOYSSSS LUNCH TIMEEEE" Phil shouts from downstairs

Tommy gets up first, techno second, and then I follow close behind, my notebook in hand.

We get near the table, I spot that one plate has less food on it then the others, techno sits there. 

We sit for awhile, not really talking. I mostly just picked at my food, taking a bite here and there to not make them suspicious.

"Wilbur if you need to eat in your room or have a smaller portion that's fine, if you eat in your room though I need to see that you actually ate, when techno came here he- oh shit nevermind about techno, but if you have any issues with eating we can help you you know, I noticed you weren't eating very quickly and whenever you did you looked like it was hard to stomach." Phil says

I write for a moment thinking 'oh God they know, they're gonna throw me out, they hate me.'

Can I eat in my room? I won't make a mess and I'll eat it all. Also I don't have eating issues I promise I just zone out sometimes and my brain gets distracted from eating

'did they buy that?'
"Okay you can go to your room if you prefer, show me the plate when your done please, you don't have to eat all of it, just enough. I believe you but if you do have issues don't be afraid to tell any of us, okay? We won't judge you and truly want to help you. I don't expect you to be perfect, its not easy to be a foster kid. I understand that"

I nod in thanks, grab my plate and head upstairs.

Tommy POV

We sit in silence for a moment. I know what they're thinking. Because I'm thinking it too.
"Is it gonna happen to him too." I mumble, just loud enough for them to hear
"I- tommy no. It'll be fine. I won't let it happen this time. It shouldn't have happened in the first place." Phil reassures
"But he- he acts just like how tech did! And we all know what happened because of that."
"That wasn't your fault tommy, I should have been more careful-"
"You shouldn't even have been doing it! I had to walk into that bathroom- I had to see you-"
"TOMS! Please not now." Phil says nodding his head to techno.

He's staring at his food and completely silent, shaking. I fucked up.

(A/N: I know this is short but idk how to continue it without it being long as shit so yeah 🧍‍♀️ also I'm no longer in the mood to write cus I got in a fight w my sister mid chapter 😍😍😍)

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