Ascension - Book Eight - Man x Man

Chapter 32

"Weren't you just saying I needed a bath?" I exhale, catching my lower lip in my teeth as I look up at him. Was this really something that was right? I had been a victim to my own intoxication before, a piece of me wondered if it was really fair to take any sort of hinting from a man who was drunk beyond recognition. He was spiraling, I knew him to well to think he wasn't attempting to cope, that he wasn't seeking assurance that I found value in him despite what his younger self revealed.

Above all else, he loved me. He didn't want to lose me, and he had feared since the moment he realized he couldn't live without me that I would choose someone else if I calculated the wrongdoings of his past with the reality of his present self. Just as I needed him to help me find my worth and meaning, he needed me to guide him through the delicate path of self-forgiveness.

"Maybe I've decided I like you dirty?" He questions, taking my hand and placing it on his ass as I'm yanked from my musings. The coarse nature of the gesture causes my cheeks to flush and I swallow hard, bringing a chuckle from him as he kisses my nose. "Is this too graphic for you?" He feels overly warm under my fingers, I stretch up on my toes, pressing my lips to his once more in an attempt to sedate the wolf in me that wished to ravish him. 

This part of the relationship was foreign to me, I didn't know how to proceed, I'd felt so confident before and now it was as if I was fresh to the scene all over again. Taking my free hand in his, he brings my palm up to his lips, kissing my wrist as he watches me intently. The intoxicated overlord gazed upon me with the sultry glance of an experienced man, even with his permission I was at his mercy.

But, in truth, it was the knowledge that he was not in his right mind that brought me to pause. The color in his cheeks, his vulgar language, and his near incapacity to keep his hands off of me rendered me to fall back on my own past. I couldn't do as he suggested, not with my knowledge of him.

My wolf fights to get free, wanting to demonstrate for him exactly how masculine I could be despite my reservations. But, my human side keeps a tight hold on the reins. He mattered more to me than any temptation, I did not want to take advantage of his vulnerability.

This was not my forte, unprepared to step into the space it would take to conquer such a being and command he recants this implied consent. He was the picture of an Alpha, a dominant in every sense. Even here, he was guiding me, giving me a green light for something I'd been hinting towards for months. I had to steer this conversation in a different direction.

"I feel like you have no idea what you are doing, in what world do you wish for me to grope you?" I tell him with a sigh, enjoying the feeling of his firm behind in my hand. It wasn't often I got to marvel at him in this way. Digging my fingers in with a firm grip, I knead the taut muscles and admire the beauty of this divine creature. He was mine, entirely mine, appreciating his form from such close range felt like a luxury given how often he was pursuing me. 

A glitch in my own hardwiring, perhaps he was more so feeling under desired. How often was it that I courted him beyond leaping into his bed at every opportunity? 

But.

This wasn't him, this was his fear of losing me, this was his drunken insecurities. Pressing my cheek to his chest, the height difference is almost comical and I feel myself simmering down into a more clear headspace. "I've never been in this position before. You're also ridiculously drunk. You're practically giggling, which while I find you incredibly charming, I'm not quite ready to take hold of you as you suggest."

Rolling his eyes, in a quick movement he tosses me onto the bed as he jerks my pants off, my bewildered body at his mercy in his haste. Inhuman in his urgency, my new body responded with animalistic vigor. As he reappears, his teeth graze the inside of my knee, resting my thighs against his shoulders as he caresses the smooth, olive skin with his warm hand. With a slow pass, he drags his tongue over the bite mark.