The Weight of Dreams || Greta Van Fleet

Chapter 35: Complicated

Jake's P.O.V

I quickly made my way through the parking lot towards our bus, cautious of anyone lingering around, trying to catch even a glimpse of Juliette. It was going to take some getting used to, now knowing her real name, but I loved that she trusted me with that. It made me feel that much closer to her. I just had to try my best not to slip up.

I opened the door, happily hopping up the steps two at a time when I was instantly face to face with all of them, gathered around in the main area of the bus, as if they had been waiting for me.
"W-what's going on?" I asked, making my way in and sliding into the open seat at the table. Josh smirked, now sitting down across from me.

"That's what we want to know." He pried. "What is going on?" I felt my cheeks burn, trying my best to contain my giddy grin. I know that Julia wanted to keep things between us. She had a hard time as it is keeping things private, so the last thing I wanted to do was make her think she couldn't trust me with whatever happened between us on her bus.

"Nothing." I said, now avoiding his eyes. "I told you, we just.. talked."
"You spent the night with Juliette and expect me to believe that all you two did was talk?" I bit down on my lip, nodding, feeling my heart start to beat faster. I wasn't lying, but.. maybe I was leaving a bit out. They didn't need to know the details of all that though.

That was just for us.

"Crazy, because I thought if anyone was getting on that bus, it was gonna be you." He laughed, now turning to Sam. My stomach dropped, having tried to block out the moments they were together, but.. it seemed like she had too. Whatever had happened between the two of them after that night at the club, I was glad that it was over.

Sam shrugged, keeping his eyes down.
"We're friends. She likes Jake." He said simply, now scrolling through his phone. But I could sense his tone, now making me wonder if it was over, for him at least.

Juliette's P.O.V

I peeked out the curtains, secretly watching as Jake quickly made his way back over to their bus, wanting nothing more than for him to stay. Even still, I couldn't wipe the stupid grin from my face. Is this how other girls felt with their boyfriends? Was this how relationships were supposed to feel? I had gone my whole life, never knowing just how amazing someone could make you feel, something so many people took for granted, I was now finally getting to experience, and now I finally understood how people could write such amazing love songs.

I felt like I could write an entire album on just the way I felt last night. He made me want to sing and dance, unable to contain myself from overflowing with-

And then I heard my phone vibrate over on the couch. I eagerly hopped over, grabbing it with the hope of seeing his name pop up again so soon, texting me to tell me he missed me already. But then my stomach dropped.

Sam: I guess you were a little busy last night.

Sam.
I had completely forgotten.
He had asked for time alone.
And I didn't even acknowledge it.

But what did he care? He didn't mention anything either. Why was this my fault? If he wanted to see me so bad, he could have made the time for it too. And what did it matter anymore? He told me how he felt. We were friends, and that's all we were ever going to be.

Especially now.

Juliette: I figured you just forgot. You didn't say anything.
Sam: You didn't say anything either.
Sam: Too busy with your boyfriend?

My stomach dropped. What had Jake told them? I guess it really didn't matter. He had spent the night over here. I'm sure they had an idea of what went on. But I knew I could trust him to keep things between the two of us. Every time we were together he showed me how different he was, and I did feel safe with him.

It wasn't easy to trust just anyone in this industry, especially people who could easily benefit from being in his situation. But.. Jake just didn't seem like the type. None of them did. And I was thankful for it. I don't know if I could survive another tour keeping to myself out of fear of being used again. It became too lonely, and all I really wanted were a group of friends that liked me for me, and not what I could do for them.

And I finally felt like I had found them.
And maybe if I was a lucky.. a little more.

Juliette: what do you care?

What did it matter to him anyway if I had spent the night with Jake? He's the one that told me it couldn't go any further because of Jake. If anything, I thought he'd be rooting for this, despite all the moments we had shared in the beginning.

I remember that day so vividly, thinking back on it all the time. From the moment I laid eyes on him I could just tell he was different. He was confident; his voice didn't shake, taking my hand and flashing me a comforting smile. I couldn't remember the last time I met someone who wasn't absolutely petrified to be in front of me. People underestimate just how dehumanizing that can feel, being treated like such a spectacle.

How quick people can forget that you're a real person.

But he didn't, and I felt it every time he held me, gripping my hand securely but oh so gently, his so strong and warm. I never wanted to let go, knowing that if he had me, I was safe from the world.

It just seemed to make sense, the two of us. They say that sometimes your person just finds you, and for a moment, I thought that's what he was. And that night in the car, I thought.. finally, something was going to happen with us. It was the first time we had actually been left alone, and I had never felt that way before, at least, not until last night.

Sam: I just think we should talk.

What could he possibly want to talk about? How many times did he have to tell me he wasn't interested in me?

Perhaps I had just forgotten what it felt like, having been turned down by him. But I think that's what made me like him even more. Anyone could have just gone along with it, despite their feelings, because it was me, but.. he didn't.

Juliette: what do we have to talk about?
Sam: what you said the other night.
Juliette: what did I say?
Sam: that's what I want to talk about, Jules lol

My heart jumped. Jules. I couldn't remember the last time someone called me that.

I quickly shook the thought, catching myself now smiling at my phone. How did he manage to do this, even still? After everything that happened? After the night I just had? Moments ago I felt like I was floating on air, filled with dizzy daydreams of new budding love, and here he was, yanking me right back down to reality.

And even still, I didn't mind. I had been far removed from reality for a long time, but the idea of a reality with him..

Juliette: we can talk later.
Sam: promise? or are you gonna be too busy with your boyfriend lol
Juliette: shut up lol
Sam: make me :P

My heart jumped, my face now feeling like it was on fire. I tossed my phone back onto the couch, heading back into my bedroom to get changed. I tossed my pajamas off into the pile of dirty laundry, now digging through suitcases for a pair of pants, and then something caught my eye. I leaned over towards the other side of my bed, spotting a foreign t-shirt.

It was Jake's.

I hesitated for a moment before finally pulling it over my head, unable to contain my grin at the subtle smell of his cologne. I plopped back down onto the bed, crawling over and grabbing the pillow he had used, pulling it up against my chest.

Why did everything have to be so complicated?