The Weight of Dreams || Greta Van Fleet

Chapter 52: It Could Have Been You

"Go, go, go!" I laughed, following him closely as he quickly swung the door closed, locking it tight. Don always made sure he had a key to my bus, but I was suddenly thankful that we changed the locks when we passed off this one to the guys, knowing that Don didn't have a way in here.

Jake flashed me a wide grin as he turned back to me, where I didn't hesitate to reach up, pulling him into a long kiss, unable to contain my grin at the feeling of his.
"Are you okay?" He sighed, still catching his breath. I nodded, taking his hand and following him up the rest of the stairs.

"We're all set." Jake said, leaning over towards their driver, patting his back. He nodded, starting the bus and soon enough we were off. I knew once we got to the next venue, I would have to deal with Don again, but until then, I was safe.

As we made our way into the main area of the bus, I could see Sam at the counter pouring drinks, sprinkling in sugar and dropping in orange peels. His head instantly perked up as he heard our footsteps, his eyes shooting down to our hands. I felt my cheeks burn.

"Well, look who decided to join us!" Josh called out. "To what do we owe the pleasure? Just felt like slumming it tonight?" I rolled my eyes, smirking over at him as I followed Jake over towards the couch. He pulled me in close, wrapping his arm around me.

"Yeah, I thought I'd see how the other half lives." I joked. He nodded, playing along.
"Yeah, yeah, well since you're here, you should have a drink. We insist. Sam, make one for Juliette too." I peeked over to see his eyes never once straying from the counter, grabbing another glass and filling it up, this time with a cherry instead of an orange.

My favorite.

"But really, what are you doing over here?" Danny asked, sitting down across from us at the table. I shrugged, not wanting to get into the details about how Don almost murdered Jake in our bus.
"I guess I just missed you guys, and.. I kinda felt like I might've been stealing your guitar player away from you a little too much." Jake leaned down, gently kissing the top of my head.
"Yeah, I don't really think they mind too much." He said softly.
"Maybe not, but he should have to slum it like the rest of us." Josh said. Jake rolled his eyes.
"I'd hardly call this 'slumming it."
"Well, I'm sure compared to Juliette's bus, it is." He jabbed, keeping that same grin.

"Are you saying you don't like the bus I got you?" I laughed. He finally sighed, rolling his eyes.
"No, it's great. Thank you." He muttered, winking at me.
"Anything for you guys." I said, peeking back over at Sam who was now carrying a glass over to me. He stayed quiet, giving me a subtle grin as he handed it over, and then sat down next to Josh.

The night was filled with playful small talk, something I had always envied, having never had a real band. Nights were lonely, so I was happy to finally start making some real friends outside of my usual circle. It was so nice just to feel.. normal.

"Well, some of us have to head to bed. Our days start earlier since we're not as important." Josh mocked, pushing himself up, catching himself on the table.

By now, the glasses were long empty, having been refilled more than enough times. I looked outside and couldn't even tell you where we were, everything blending together into a blur of street lights and starry skies.

"The bunks are kinda small.." Jake whispered, leaning in close. "So, I can make up my bed for you and I can sleep out here, so you're comfortable." I bit down on my lip, peeking back up at him.
"I'd be more comfortable with you." I said. His smile grew.
"So would I, but.. they're small."
"So are we." I laughed. He nodded, leaning in, gently kissing my cheek.
"Alright, but don't say I didn't warn you." He said, getting up and taking my hand, leading me back towards the bunks.

He wasn't kidding.

"Remind me to get you guys bigger bunks for the next tour." I laughed. He nodded.
"Noted. But for now.."
"For now, I still want to share it with you." I said softly. He held his stare on me for a moment, his smile growing.
"Okay, but.. there's not as much privacy here so.. you may need to resist me for a few hours."
"I'll try." I whispered, smirking up at him before pulling him back into another long kiss. He sighed, leaning his forehead against mine.
"Who am I kidding, you can do whatever you want to me." He whispered, kissing me again before pulling his shirt over his head and crawling into his bunk.

"If you want to finish getting ready, the bathroom is right over there, you know, if you can fit." I playfully shoved him, rolling my eyes. But they would definitely need more space for their next tour.

If there was a next tour.

I didn't think I was in there long, but when I came back out I could already hear the familiar, faint snoring over in the bunks. But looking over, I could see that only three of the curtains were pulled shut, one still open and empty. I made my way into the kitchen to see Sam still sitting up at the table, his eyes fixated on the rapid blurs of the outside world flying by the window.

"Not tired?" I asked, leaning up against the door frame. He looked over at me, giving me a gentle smile.
"I'm exhausted." He said simply. I giggled to myself, holding up my hand as I made my way over to him, trying my best to not make it too obvious that I had drank too much. As I sat down across from him, his eyes met mine, and for a split second I was brought back to that first night of the tour, the first time he shook my hand, so strong and confident and comforting.

"Are you okay?" I asked. He held his stare on me for a moment before shrugging, bringing his attention back down to his empty glass.
"I guess." He sighed. "I guess that.. it's my fault."
"What's your fault?"
"I just.. I have no right to be jealous when.. things could have been different." My stomach dropped.
"Jealous?" I asked, now feeling my heart beat faster. "Jealous of.. what?" He was quiet again.
"Nothing." He muttered, pushing himself up from the table. "It won't make a difference."

I knew that I should just leave it alone, but..

"Sam, wait, just.. talk to me." I said softly. He stopped, holding up his hand against the wall to keep his balance. His glass seemed to need refilling much quicker than anyone else's.

"Juliette, what if I had said that.. I didn't want to just be friends?" He asked. My heart jumped.
"W-what?"
"That night.. at the club. What if.. well, what if things went.. differently?"
"W-what do you mean?" He sighed, running his fingers through his hair.

"Forget it. It doesn't matter anyway, right?"
"Sam, of course it matters."
"Juliette, that night at the club, when we went back to your bus, you told me that.. you would have given all of this up to be with me. Do you remember that?"

My whole body went cold. Flashes of that night played through my mind, but even still I was still unable to remember what was real and what was my own imagination. But even still, even before that, he had turned me down. And I remembered that perfectly.

"You told me we were friends." I said, now avoiding his eyes.
"I know."
"Sam, what are you doing?" I finally asked, feeling like I was going to be sick. Everything was perfect now with Jake, why did he wait until now to say something? He shrugged, looking away again.

"Nothing." He muttered. "I'm.. I'm gonna go to bed."
"Fine." I snapped. "Leave. Just like always." He stopped, turning to face me, making his way over as quickly as he could manage.

"Just like always?" He said, his face now becoming more stern. "Juliette, you're the one who told me we were friends. Yeah, maybe I said it first, but.. when I wanted to talk about it-"
"When you wanted to talk about it, it was too late." I said, now feeling my face get hot.

And it was.
I knew how I felt about Jake now.
And it was for the best that things never happened between the two of us.

"So, what are you saying?" He asked.
"I'm saying.. maybe there was a time where.. it could have been you. But now it can't."
"And why not?"
"Because I love him."