Whispers Of False Promises » bangchan [indefinite hiatus]

episode 33: a complete family

As soon as Miko, Hyeon-ju, and Hee-yeol got to know about the news of my forthcoming wedding, well, there was a series of endless chaos in the studio. Miko was squealing and jumping on her spot, Hyeon-ju hopped forth to hug me tightly, and Hee-yeol was agape, examining the ring on my finger. 

"Are you serious?" Hee-yeol asked skeptically, "Tell me you're not pulling a prank on us." 

"Why would she do that!" Hyeon-ju snapped at him, and then smiled back at me, "Our Kaira is all grown up. She's getting married!" 

"And that, too, to Bang Chan!" Miko gushed, having the biggest, purest smile on her face, "I'm so happy for you, sis! Ahhh!" 

"Guys, guys, relax," I chuckled, attempting to calm them down, "There's still time until the wedding-" 

"When is it?!" Miko grasped my hand with both of hers, bouncing on her spot. 

"The wedding date still hasn't been decided, but our parents are arriving tomorrow, so we'll have to discuss that with them. I'm... nervous!" I giddily trembled. 

"Hey, hey," Hyeon-ju took up the motherly role, "Don't be nervous. This is something huge, I agree, but then again, it is something so beautiful and pure. You're about to be a wife, and even though that thought might make you anxious, just think about the life you're about to lead with him! It's blissful, isn't it?" 

A smile spread across my lips, "Yes, you're right, Hyeon-ju. It's... about to be beautiful. I'm sure it will be." 

---

The next day, my parents arrived from my hometown, and thankfully, I had spent the previous night cleaning up the apartment. I set up a bed in the smaller, extra room in my apartment that I had been using as a store room, for me to use. My parents could stay in my room because that was more presentable and spacious. 

The doorbell rang, and I swallowed a lump in my throat; I was going to meet them after years. I stepped toward the door, and my hands shook as I opened the door to see my parents standing there, equally as terrified to see me, but perhaps in the happiest manner possible. Terrified and happy? I did not expect to use these two terms together, but when we saw each other, these two emotions bundled up and intermixed. 

My mom was the first one to speak, "Kaira... my child." 

My child -- because it was difficult to see them say that to me in person after Eunji. Post her demise, I had forgotten that I was still a child of theirs. Well... until I now saw them in person. 

I smiled, my eyes softening, and she hugged me tightly, her eyes at teary as mine. Feeling her wrap me in her motherly embrace yet again after so many years, it felt like a lifetime had passed ever since I had sensed this touch. I felt my shoulder wettening, and I figured that she was crying; as much as I wanted to, too, I kept my tears suppressed. I could not break down in front of them again. 

She parted, wiping her tears off, and my father spoke up in a hoarse voice, as if he was stifling his tears down his throat, "How have you been, Kaira?" 

"I... I've been okay, dad," I whispered, gulping, "It's been..." my voice cracked as a tear slipped by, "It's been hard without you two." 

My father opened up his arms for me, and after a long, long time, I realized that I was still their same old girl, with the same old fears, same old inhibitions, same old homesickness. As I wrapped my arms around him, the nostalgia that overcame me was enough to tell me that I was still Kaira -- their child, Kaira. 

"It's been difficult without you, too," my dad spoke, able to express his feelings freely in this moment of overpowering emotions, 

"I finally feel like a parent again." 

My mother sobbed, nodding and rubbing my back. With this parental love that I had been missing all this time, I was transported back to my childhood, feeling as vulnerable as a young child feels. And for a second, I could see flashes of my childhood right before my eyes: with Eunji holding my hand to lead me to the playground, puerile giggles erupting from both of us; her excited voice telling me to sit on the seesaw before her; her complaining over my weight not being enough to lift her in the air; my dad laughing and pushing my side of the seesaw down to let her have her moment of glory up high; my mom calling us home for freshly made lemonade. It truly felt like that moment occurred the day before. 

Time had been cruel to us all, but now, in their embrace, with my mom joining in the hug, I felt content. It felt right. 

And even though Eunji was not physically present with us, I felt her presence wrapping her arms around us again, making us a happy, complete family yet again. 

(a/n: bro i almost cried at the end :") what about you? did you feel the emotions? 

how do you feel about the regular updates? i've been updating quite frequently these days, so is this pace okay? 

thanks for reading! i love you!)