Chapter 36 | In the library

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( POV: RAZE AEDEN )

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( POV: RAZE AEDEN )

Stepping back into the castle felt like returning to my very own personified prison. I know we'll be safe here but that doesn't mean that I feel good about being here.

But we'll be safe. That is if Fallon and I don't try to kill each other again. That is what got us in trouble last time.

I doubt we'll try to do something that impulsive. Yet she is trying her very best to push me away, even after promising she wouldn't.

She's too frightened. For what exactly, I don't know.

We're both lying low in the library. She's avoiding Corvina and I'm avoiding Laurent.

He's been bothering me with his opinions. He's right about a lot of things but I don't want to listen to it. For example, he's forcing me to write to my excuse of a father. A show of power as you may.

He's also pushing me to get married, arguing that the engagement is good but that marriage would solidify our alliance.

He's also right about that.

My father surely knows Fallon, he recognizes her as The Crow. Both Fallon's father and my father want us dead, what's more powerful or meaningful than us joining our forces?

However, a huge wedding now doesn't seem like the right thing to do. Also, she'll never truly marry me. The engagement is the maximum. It's not like I want to marry her anyway.

Not when we're being chased and hunted down from all sides. At the same time, it's not like we have a choice.

Another thing that's been on my mind constantly is how fucking exhausted I am. I could never tell Fallon this but I'm so tired from being so vulnerable, so considerate, so understanding all the damn time.

She'd automatically assume it's because of her. She'd think I'm sick of her which is not the case. At all. I'm just not used to behaving this way and it's tiring.

"What are you thinking about?" I hear her sweet voice and suddenly all my questions and problems aren't that important.

She's sitting on the chaise, her tan legs are already distracting me. I gradually look up to meet her eyes and she's clutching a book between her hands. Her eyes inspecting the pages before she looks up at me again.

We arrived here only yesterday. The exhaustion hit us all and I think the only thing we succeeded to do was eat and get ourselves cleaned.

Fal wasn't going to sleep with me. She was making her way towards the other bedroom attached to mine. The one where she used to stay.

I didn't let her though. I tugged her to me and just laid there with her in my arms. That's the only time I'm sure she's safe.

She apologized again and again. It didn't matter how many times I told her it wasn't necessary and that I understood her reasoning.

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