Behind My Back ✓ tk

T H I R T Y N I N E

»»——THIRTY NINE——««

WE'RE GOING DOWN DOWN

JUNG Hoseok hadn't expected the first thing to happen when he went out of the bathroom was to be pushed against the wall by someone he hadn't seen in a very long time. And that someone wasn't even that much of a stranger to him. Even though the former blonde had dark red hair now and an ear piercing more, he was still the same old Kim Taehyung. The same old Kim Taehyung that had abandoned his friends because he got himself a manipulative boyfriend, had started a fight between his roommate and himself, and so basically ditched everyone who wasn't friends with his boyfriend.

But not too long ago his vision on his actions had changed. He wasn't so sure about his boyfriend anymore. That doubt mixed itself together with admitting to himself that he actually didn't like his boyfriend's stupid ass friends that hung around their room every day. Plus how he hated it that they treated their gay relationship as something strange, when Youngjae had told him he had been gay for a very long time. It seemed as if his friends were weirded out by their friend being with a guy, when the said guy had been gay for so long. If they were his close friends, they should know about it, no? Or have a suspicion at least.

But no, they acted as if what Youngjae did – dating Taehyung - was totally random. Especially that one blonde guy, Yugyeom, who had acted as if their relationship was wrong. Not because they were two guys though, no, because he seemed to think Youngjae didn't really like Taehyung. And it made the – now cherry red headed guy – wonder if maybe the blonde dude had been right.

What if Taehyung had just been another experiment? What if he had fallen for another straight dude again? Those thoughts were the ones he had been ignoring for ages, telling himself they were too stupid to even consider. He didn't think Youngjae was just using him as an experiment since they had been together for more than three months now and no straight guy would keep a relationship going for so long when he knew the experiment was done, right?

So what if his intention hadn't been on figuring out his sexuality? What if it had actually just been revenge? It frustrated Taehyung even more when he thought of that. Being used for an experiment was one thing (something he had hated, sure, but not as bad as the next thing), but being used to take revenge on someone? As if he was a toy that could be played with? That was terribly wrong.

Had Youngjae just been lying about his feelings for Taehyung? Had he secretly laughed at Taehyung for falling for his trap and being so goddamn naïve?

Why was this happening to him? He had been someone's sexuality experiment for way too many boys to count. Just because he was an extravert, loud, social and openly gay, didn't mean he wanted to be treated like a boy's personal labrat. He might seem confident in what he does and how he looks, but on the inside he is as fragile as a 13 year old girl going through her emo phase.

But of course, he wasn't sure everything he was thinking was right. It could be that Youngjae did actually like him. It could be that he never told his friends about his sexuality. It could be that Jimin had just been overreacting.

He didn't know.

And that was why he needed to talk to someone- someone that could tell him more about what happened between Jeongguk and him from the younger's point of view. So he could place everything in the right perspective and maybe then figure out what the hell he was supposed to think.

And Hoseok was an easy target for that.

"You need to tell me something", was the first thing he said to a surprised Hoseok. The older arched an eyebrow at that and pushed the younger off before patting his clothes incase they got dirty from touching the wall.

"First of all, an hello would be appreciated. Second of all, sure, though it's a surprise you'd want to listen to me at all. Since when did you started talking to us again?"

That stung. But Taehyung knew he deserved that. He had totally abandoned his friends after all.

"I just need an answer okay? That day you guys were in the coffee shop in the morning, and I couldn't join. What was the reason for that?", Taehyung asked, seeing the other's eyebrows furrow.

"I don't think I'm supposed to tell you that", Hoseok started but then seemed to change his mind, "Though I don't think our plan is going to work with everyone disliking you at the moment so maybe I could tell you".

Taehyung internally winced at that, just thinking about all his friends hating his guts, and most of all knowing he deserved that.

"Please tell me, I really need to know", he begged, feeling like what Hoseok was about to say would change everything.

The older sighed and crossed his arms, "The reason why we were at that coffee shop without you was because we specifically asked Jeongguk to not tell you where we were".

Taehyung frowned, "What-"

"Because", Hoseok proceeded, giving him a stern look, "We wanted Jeongguk to be a part of your birthday surprise party".

Down. we. go.

"We thought, since you seemed to like the damn guy so much, you'd want him on your birthday party too. And it would be much more handy if we could throw the party at your dorm instead of luring you to somewhere. So he agreed to help, share the cost of the present, and not tell you anything – though he felt bad for lying to you".

Just kill me now.

"But then all these troubles started to surface between you two and Jeongguk. We didn't think too much of it until he told Jimin he wouldn't be attending the birthday party since he thought you didn't want him there. We, of course, were shocked and tried to change his mind. But he seemed very uncomfortable about the topic so we stopped asking. A few days ago we came to know that you two had a fight just before he decided not to come. Of course we understood the situation".

I want the sweet release of death.

"So we wanted to do the birthday party in your dorm without Jeongguk, but then we heard you moved out and into your boyfriend's dorm so yeah, that plan was also thrown out of the window. And to be honest, after you started being distant to us, the whole plan already began to falter anyway. The last straw was your reason of being angry with Jeongguk. Just the fact you never even tried to ask him for an explanation and never tried to see things from his perspective. You just assumed everything, and believed the things your boyfriend told you- who by the way is one of Jeongguk's bullies from highschool. So it's easy to say your birthday party is pretty non-existent at the moment".

Hoseok merely blinked after he had finished his explanation, a little amused at the changing of Taehyung's expressions through his whole rant. It had gone from shock, to guilt, to surprise, to anger and then pure sadness. He knew it was pretty sadistic to enjoy Taehyung being hurt. But for once, Hoseok thought he deserved it. He knew his friend was a good guy that had just found a bad guy, but that didn't mean he didn't deserve this guilty feeling.

"Go", Hoseok spoke after a minute of silence, "Go to him".

That was all Taehyung needed to hear before dashing up the stairs to his former dorm, in hopes to find a boy there that was pure enough to forgive him.

×××××

woah i just wrote this chapter in a span of half an hour, barely thinking and just letting the words flow out. felt pretty good. i wanted to write for almost three days now, and had the inspiration for it, but didn't have time so this sudden free time to write an entire chapter and to just let it all out was like um an writer's orgasm (if you know what i mean?) (i hope you know what i mean)