infamous

36 - the calm week

ah yes, at last, i can sit down, have a drink, a smoke, and just talk to whoever.

im not worried about the grounders tonight. that bomb sent a good number of them straight to the devil.

word travels quickly, especially with jaspers stories, told around the fire, but he leaves out the part he should actually tell.

"i still dont get it mackinnon, why were you so close to the bridge?" shawn asks, heaps of people looking to me, cigarette in hand, sitting next to bellamy.

"i was hunting" i reply, looking the brown haired boy right in the eyes.

"what did they look like?" monty asks me.

"pretty sure jasper went through each outfit individually" i joke, as the kid smiles, and people laugh.

"im lucky you came man" jasper says to me.

bec is sitting across from me, not too interested in the whole conversation/listening group.

"ive got a bone to pick with you, you missed a part of the story" i say to him, and he swallows, adams apple going down his throat.

he thinks im about to say he panicked, missed the shots and was ready to die. but im not. they can go with his story that he panicked, and was ready to take another shot, but thats when i came.

"after i took the shot, the virus hit me. pretty sure whoever had the bad strain knows that its teetering on the edge of death. jasper carried me all the way back, shot a rabid dog, kept me alive. just cause i took the shot doesnt mean jasper isnt a hero, same as raven, finn and everyone else who helped yesterday, with anything" i say, flicking the end of my cigarette into the fire.

people pat jasper on the back, give him high fives and the works, as i stand, and walk over to bec.

she doesnt look at me, just to the fire.

"whats up?" i ask her. i feel like she's angry at me, and the way she turns to look at me, confirms exactly that.

she doesnt say anything, but turns to leave.

at the same time, bellamy comes over to me, but i walk after bec, who walks towards the empty dark part of camp, near the exit toward the graves.

"bec" i say, touching her hand.

she yanks it away, then pushes my chest, as bellamy stands a few feet behind me.

"go away" she says, furious and emotional.

"i left, you were safe in the tent, i come back, you're like this?" i ask, and she slows her breathing, blue eyes ripping through me.

"tell me right now nath, were you outside to hunt animals?" she asks, and i nod.

"i shot a dear, a good one, but my eyes started bleeding, so i thought id take a few out before i died, alone in the woods" i say, but before i can finish she's shaking her head.

"if you thought that, you would've come back" 

"no, i wouldnt, because i heard those drums" i lie. i had decided to try and get to the bridge way before this, but if she doesnt realise that this is war, she wont understand.

"so what, you're right next to the bridge and they start banging their drums?"

"no, i ran for it. i heard the drums, i knew they were crossing, so i was gonna attack before they slaughtered us all"

she takes a moment, tears already pooling in her eyes.

"so you use the bullets you had on the ones trying to cross the bridge, then what? you got lucky that you were there, but i know you, you plan these things. you dont use your head for anything else other than this stuff" she says, looking at bellamy, who waits behind me, not looking at us, but we. both know he's within earshot.