sanctuary // george joji miller

twenty nine

Dorm Landlord
you're moving in today?

Freya Astrid
can i?

Dorm Landlord
yeah, sure,
what happened though?
you said you're moving
a week before your classes

Freya Astrid
i just thought it would be better
to prep early and stuff

I'm shaking as I type the text messages, I'm still crying in my room as I pack my things, I don't know how to tell Jane about this.

I don't know how to tell my friends about it.

I've been crying since this morning and it's already past lunch, I didn't eat but I cooked one last meal for George. He also hasn't come out of his room since.

Where did I go wrong?

I have a lot of questions inside my mind but there's no one to answer all of them. I have a void inside me and I don't know how to fill it in. I do feel like there's a hole inside me for the past few weeks ever since he distanced himself but that hole as become a bottomless void, a blackhole.

I'm practically just shoving my clothes to the luggage bag, shoving my books and make up on another bag, I looked at the what I should bring with me.

I know I can't bring everything in one go. I practically live here and all of my things are in here. This is my home. My sanctuary.

He was my sanctuary, but I guess not anymore.

"I just don't understand, why?" I whispered to myself, losing breath from continually crying.

I have to call Ezra.

"Hello?" He answered immediately after the first ring. "Freya? Are you crying?"

"Please pick me up, can you borrow Auntie's car? Please." I told him, not even trying to hide the fact that I'm crying.

"Alright, alright, will be there in five."

I dropped the call and continued to put everything I could in the only two large bags I have with me, my room is a mess, and I'm leaving it like that.

I don't know when I'll come back but I'll just deal with it by then.

Will I even come back?

Fuck, I'm just really frustrated and.. I'm just in an agonizingly painful situation right now.

I never thought this day would come.

I was so sure of him.

And from what I knew he feels the same way with me.

What happened?

My phone buzzed, signaling a notification from Joji's twitter account. It's a reply to one of his fans on his tweet.

@greywhenever: @sushitrash you got a girlfriend? Because if you do, I'll ship that shit deep af.

@sushitrash: I'm gay

I guess this is really it. He's even denying he has a girlfriend in social media now.

It was really for real. It's not a dream.

We were a good dream,
and it's time for me to wake up.

While reading the other replies I got a call from Ezra.

"I'm outside." He said on the line, faint sound of the car is heard on the background. He was able to bring the car then.

He's being my life saver again.

"I'm going out." I replied shortly and dropped the call again. I zipped my bags and just stood up, not even looking at the mirror.

I just don't care about anything at least at this moment. I noisily dragged and levered my two bags down the stairs, sniffling and still having a hard time to breathe.

I can't believe this is happening right now.

I used to always fantasize of just us living together for a long time, maybe in this house, or honestly anywhere is fine.

We were each other's sanctuaries, anyways.

Upon my surprise, I saw George sitting on the couch watching TV with a cigarette in hand. Our eyes met but even he quickly looked away, I noticed his bloodshot eyes. He's been crying too.

"I'm leaving." I informed him.

"Who's taking you?" He asked, with a hint of concern in his voice. "Have you called Ezra?"

"Why do you care?" I snapped. "You're so fucking confusing."

"I'm sorry." He mumbled, looking away then lit up his cigarette.

I bit my lip as I try to constrain myself from saying more of what's in my mind.

But fuck it.

"I just don't understand George, why?" I cried. "Where did I go wrong?"

Tears started to fill his eyes, but he won't look at me. He inhaled from his smoke, closing his eyes. The tears started to fall. I stood as I just watched him ignore me and him close to breaking down in front of me.

And even he broke me, in that moment I wanted to run to him and cradle him in my arms because I hate seeing him cry.

As much as I want, I can't.

I don't have that responsibility and role anymore.

He's not mine anymore.

"I'm so sorry, Freya." was all he said, standing up and going to his room, shutting it close and leaving me alone.

Again.

I stormed out of the house, crying my heart out. Ezra was at the gate and has a very concerned look on his face. Upon seeing me, he sprinted to help me with my bags and to put it on the back of the car.

"I'm so sorry." He told me, probably understanding the situation already even I didn't said a word to him yet.

"That's all I've been hearing today." I replied, shutting the car door close. "Let's go."

Ezra started the car and I took one last look of the Miller's house.

Goodbye, George.

————————

If yall are wondering when's a joji pov, might come in chap 35 or smth, idk i'm not sure myself i don't plan my stories i just write on the spot ily all thank u for still being here aaaaaa

pls vote too, it makes mi happi
Σ>―(〃°ω°〃)♡→