sanctuary // george joji miller

thirty eight

"I didn't listened to it yet." I shrugged as I laid my back on the grass.

We're in the usual grass field near where Ezra practices mostly everyday after school. Max and Ian already went home so it's just me and Frank, I'm really planning to wait for Ezra cause he promised to treat me Mcdonald's.

It's just one of those days where I feel heavier than the usual. It's probably because of the release, and I can't find myself the energy to listen to it.

"I already listened to it, it's a masterpiece." Frank commented, "But I do understand if you don't want to listen to it, personally I think most of the songs are-"

"Don't even say it." I sighed. "Do you think I can take it?"

"You know, Freya," he started as he sat beside me on the grass. "If you ever break down while you listen to it right now, know that I'm here."

"What do you mean?"

"You have a shoulder to cry on, you know what I mean?"

I was taken aback by his words as I remember my whole life it's always me who says that to people. Realizing it now, lately my friends are supporting me on what I'm going through.

Feels nice to hear it from others.

"Fuck it, fine, I will." I said as I grab my earphones from the pockets of my jeans.

"Pretend I'm not even here," he laughed. "Enjoy. Oh, by the way, I have a double jack audio adaptor, wanna use it so we can listen at the same time?"

"Oh, that would be cool." I told him, and watched as he stood up to fetch it from his bag that's on the bench.

I lent him my phone, he connected both my earphones and his to the adaptor then to the phone.

"Ready?"

"Uhuh."

The first song played, I closed my eyes as I let myself drown to the sound.

When it's lovely
I believe in anything
What does love mean
When the end is rolling in?

Same questions to myself, George.

Let it go, let it stay
Can we love one another
Cold? Is it safe to be warm in the summer?
Who knows?
I said who knows?

I shook my head as I listened to his words, chuckling to myself.

Ooh, teach me to love just to let me go
I can't believe that I'm not enough
Not enough
And so long, no one will be here to save you
And no one will be here to let you know
Let you know

This is your world, this is your world
This is your world, this is your world

I felt my chest tightening as I put my full attention to the song.

Quietly still
In a lie
Oh, goodnight
I don't mind

I can't even describe what I'm feeling towards him, all I know is I miss him. A lot.

I looked over to Frank as the song finished, he's just looking far away, probably in his own little world.

A song titled Modus came next, I opened my eyes and looked at the red-ish skies, I exhaled and just listened to the lyrics.

And I hope this is the hardest part
We try, we try
And when they say they're satisfied
They're lying, they're lying
Do forgive me, I've seen the treasure's in the bloom