Lost (Harry Styles Fan Fiction)

Chapter 62- Daisy

Chapter 62- Daisy

"I know it's only been about two weeks but I felt like I needed to talk to you." He sat down on a chair. I couldn't turn around, I couldn't bare seeing that hurt face of his. I'm so messed up right now. "When I saw you this morning I felt like we should talk."

"About what?" I dumbly asked. I looked around me and realised that sir must of taken my guitar with him and left it at the university. Damn, I wanted to practise some new song he recommended. 

"Choosing the right answer." Harry simply breathed. My body turned round and my shaking hand took the nearest chair, placing it in front of the boy and sitting opposite him- doing all without making eye contact. "This morning, when I saw you, you said you needed more time to settle down."

"Which, I think I do."

"You see, you think. You don't know, you don't see, you think, Daisy." Harry leaned closer, on his thighs to try and get me to look at him. My breathing had recently kicked back in at the time, but the rest of my body couldn't come to any sense. "You think you need more time to settle down but I know that I can't. We both can't just settle down."

"What if I can? It's only been two weeks, Harry. What if this can stop-"

"It won't stop. Not until you find out what's actually good for you because I, for example, know that having you furthest away from me is far from good."

A long silence filled the air.

"I thought the same about you until I thought that maybe in a couple of weeks time this misery of not being near you would clear out of the way." I admitted.

"Was the first week worse than the second or the other way round?" My eyebrows furrowed yet my eyes still never took the risk of looking in to his. I knew that he was on a task to get me to look at him, to feel weak and to feel as if being away from him for a while is worse than I thought. 

"All I know is that I miss you...and that I want that feeling to go away at least for a second." My voice barely made a whisper, cracking in between. I made sure not to tell him that the second week was worse. A lot more worse.

"And don't you think you'll stop missing me if you accept to come back?"

"But if I come back to you I know what will happen." That's when I looked up.

Harry's eyes were darker than usual, the dark I didn't like. The one I get completely lost in, thinking why and how they turned that shade. The expected concerned look wasn't the one that filled his features, he looked slightly inflamed and a little bit aroused. 

"What will happen?" He asked. "What is so important that you think will definitely happen?"

"That I'll fall in love with someone again and it'll be a waste of time." Harry didn't even budge in his seat. He kept his eyes on me, and he kept his straight face. "I'll be a waste of time because I always have to complicate things."

"Do you think I'd hurt you, Daisy? Ever?"

"You see that's the thing, I know you wouldn't because you care so much for me and you've told me that over and over again but somehow it keeps coming to mind that everything in the past will come back to me again. My parents were murdered, that keeps coming back. I got bullied, I keep getting reminded of that as well and now all of a sudden, my past heart that broke has come back, repaired for another round apparently." I took a deep breath in. "I just don't know if I'm ready for that yet."

"But you wouldn't have to be ready because the last thing I'd want to do is hurt you. In any way, Daisy." Harry leaned closer and the look on his face finally softened. He obviously got what my reason to stay away from him was. He knew it was my past's fault that got in the way of everything I tried to have fun with, not him or me, just my past.