My Teddy

33-

{Brooklyn}

I pull my hood over my head, muttering to myself as everyone files out of school at the end of the day.

Today marks day 3 of me walking home from school and it's been making me think a little more clearly.

I turn as Gabby starts calling me name.

"Brook, wait!"

"Hey, I'm glad I could catch you before you left."
She says, completely out of breath.

I don't really have a lot to say these days.

What's the point? It'll just make everything more terrible than it already is.

Everybody at school avoids me like the plaque. I'm a loner.

I took over his fucking legacy.

"You walking home too?"
I say reluctantly, hiding my disappointment as she falls into step next to me.

Oh man, I already know that she wants to talk. I heard Dante asking her to try to talk to me yesterday.

"So. How's everything going?"
She asks, just as expected.

I sigh.

Here we go again.

How do everyone think my life is going?

Jordan left me.

The first boy I ever liked, my first impression of new feelings.

It's embarrassing just thinking about it, why would anybody in their right mind expect me to want to talk about it?

I shouldn't care as much as I do, he never even told me he loved me back.

I should have known.
I don't know how I could have but I wish I did.

I don't say any of that, the words that come out of my mouth are,
"Cool, I guess."

She side eyes me just like she's been doing for the past couple of weeks.

I know that she doesn't believe me.

"That's good. Just know that I'm here if you ever want to talk. I may not get it but I'm a good listener."
She pats my shoulder.

My mind is sadly still on he who shall not be named.

It's been a long time since I last saw him. Since I've even been in his presence.

I still remember his smell and how comfortable I used to always be around him.

The house comes into view.

"Ooh, Danny's home early."
Gabby mutter, digging around in her bag for the key.

It feels like I'll never get over him though.

He had everything that I liked that I didn't even know I liked.

I miss his arms around me, his soothing voice.

"Brooklyn, honey..."
Liz appears in the living room to give me my daily after school hug.

It's something she started doing that I secretly love.

It's like a little routine and I definitely can't pass up affection from others at this point.

She's so nice.

"How was school?"
She asks running her fingers through her hair.

"Hell."
Gabby answers for me.

I silently agree anyway.