Tabula Rasa (BakuDeku)

40

Fuzzybrain

Katsuki doesn't want to be here.

In fact, he'd rather be in his room. Alone. But instead of letting him mull over his thoughts and beat himself up for not doing jack shit during the raid today, his friends shoved their nosy selves into his life like they always do, and drag him to Denki's room to unwind.

So yeah, he'd rather be anywhere but here.

"Bro, stop cheating! I swear to god if you-"

"How? This isn't even my console!" Hanta and Denki are bickering over their game, Eijirou and Mina are sprawled out across Denki's bed, and Katsuki wants just to go home.

Katsuki appreciates them trying to act like nothing happened, but it's impossible. He just lost his fucking boyfriend and doesn't know what to do. What can he do, other than sit here and do nothing?

He fucking hates it.

His eyes wander over to the "liquor table", aka the desk, and peer at the grey goose vodka with a vague curiosity. He doesn't drink, but...

"Why do you like alcohol anyway? It's gross," Katsuki asks, shuddering. It's the fifth official 'Saturday Squad Hangout's that he despises, but it's the second time they've actually had alcohol present. He's only had a sip of his parents alcohol like every kid, and he doesn't remember the taste being anything but downright horrid.

"It's fun bro!" Denki slurs, cheeks flushed pink, "Well...not the tasting part. But after you drink it everything gets fuzzy and funny! And you forget shit, ya know? Like, the bad stuff."

At the time, Katsuki thought it was nonsense. Who would drink something so... disgusting just to be drunk for a little, and have a splitting headache in the morning? But now that Katsuki's given it half a thought, he'd give anything to forget.

"Oi, Pikachu," Katsuki's eyes don't leave the right of the room, "How much alc do I need to drink to forget?"

The electric teen swivels around on his gaming chair, yellow eyes narrowed, "Thought you didn't drink?"

"Well," Katsuki pushes himself off the floor with hands on his knees, "It's a special fucking occasion." Snatching the vodka off the desk, he feels the weight of it in his hands. It's definitely heavier than he expects, "What about this one?"

"Bakugou, I don't know if you sh-"

"Shut it, Pinky." He spits. Eijirou sighs.

"Fine dude. But you can't go overboard," Katsuki glares at him next. He doesn't run his life.

Putting the controller down, Denki wanders over to the desk and pulls the bottle out of his hands, "You can, but I'm pouring it." Katsuki crosses his arms.

"I'm not a fucking baby." Honestly, they're all making such a big deal out of this. So what, he doesn't drink and now that he's sad he wants a sip? It's been a rough week and a half, alright?

Denki pours the vodka into a red solo cup, only about one fourth of the way. When he hands it back, Katsuki narrows his eyes, "This is fucking nothing." Denki laughs and pats his arm.

"For vodka? Nah, you're set." And he just wanders back to his chair, picks up the controller, challenging Hanta to play a new game. Katsuki has half a mind to pour himself some more, but he doesn't know how to open the bottle. If he ever wants more, he can just go back.

So he joins Mina and Eijirou on the bed. Cradling the cup in his hands, he throws his head back and chugs the whole drink in one go. He keens, a cold shiver running down his spine and for a second, Katsuki's convinced he's going to throw up. But then, the alcohol slides down his throat and warms his belly, and maybe alcohol isn't as bad as he thought.