The World's Funniest Shit

33. Comebacks to Insults

1. Douchebag: Did your parents ever ask you to run away from home?

Me: Did your parents ever ask you to jump out a window?

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2. Whore: Your so ugly!

Me: Really?

Whore: Yeah, duh.

Me: Well good, I was trying to look like you today.

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3. Guy: FAIL!

Me: Dude, nobody asked for your life story.

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4. Guy: You need to go on a diet.

Me: I'm short, fat, and proud of that! So, fuck off.

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5. Girl: Your so stupid!

Me: Last time I checked, that was your middle name.

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6. Girl: You're such a whore.

Me: Compared to your boyfriend, I'm basically a virgin. Last night, he was dragging two drunk asses into a bedroom at that party you missed out on.

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7. Coward: (Whispering) Oh my god, do you see her shitty clothes?

Me: Bitch, please. Save the drama for your mama.

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8. Random guy: (Glares at you)

Me: If looks could kill, you would be a weapon if mass destruction. Well, if you don't accidentally kill yourself first.

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9. Coach: You need to go work out!

Me: I exercise! I do one sit-up everyday... When I wake up and get out of bed.

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10. Nerd: SHUT UP!

Me: You are a big wet blanket on my fire of fun.

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Lol, I just noticed #10 sounds really dirty..........

HA! Betcha just reread it again. But it still sounds really wrong. I also noticed how the ending where I always ramble on, it's like longer than the actual jokes I post. It's weird. Damn, I'm noticing a lot of shit. I should be a scientist!

Na, I'll probably explode the fucking building down before I do something useful. Just saying. Peace out!

*Brofi- wait. Wait. Just curious, do you guys actually brofist whatever thing you're using to read this? That'll be awesome. Now the real ending.

*Brofist*