1. Women may not hit hard, but they can hit low. So watch out boys!
2. When in doubt, mumble.
3. Cheer up, the worse is yet to come.
4. Don't tell me the sky is the limit when there's fucking footprints on the moon.
5. Evil is just Live spelled backwards.
6. I'm not sick, just twisted. They make it sound like sickness can be cured.
7. Life was much easier when Apple and Blackberry were just fruits.
8. Advice I give myself during gym: Run as if the cops are chasing after you!
9. Whatever you do, always give 100%
Unless you're donating blood. That would be bad. VERY BAD.
10. I'll be there in 10 minutes, if not, read this message again.
--------------------------------------
It's 2014! I'm a little late though, I'm sorry! So I was at the bottom of the stairs and was about to exit the door when this asshole began running down the stair and fucking ran into me.
Since I'm weak as fuck, I toppled down and knocked myself against the pole thingy. It didn't hurt that much since I had a sweatshirt on. Still, fuck that guy. I also want to thank everybody who has voted or read this and laughed even though none of these are mine except for one or two.
I would thank everyone of you guys personally but that's too much work and I don't do work unless it's at school and the teachers make me. Alright, peace out!
*Brofist*
YOU ARE READING
The World's Funniest Shit
HumorJokes, comebacks, insults, quotes, yo mama's, and other meaningless funny shit. I try to find some you haven't heard before because that's just lame if you've heard the same thing again and again. MUST READ if you don't I can't do anything but still...
