ALLURED : [#bound by attraction]

Chapter 56

SUMAYYA

I sat up quietly on our bed with ammar and eman still asleep beside me and began to reflect on my life . It suddenly just dawned on me that these days I've been low on iman and I am not concentrating as much on my deen .

It felt more like I had less passion, I wasn't as excited to pray as before, my mind would just skip off during prayer.

I felt like I was straying away from Allah and my life was beginning to lose purpose. I had been so blinded with all the world's distraction that I was beginning to forget how to concentrate on serving my lord.

I quickly stood up and got my prayer mat out and I did the only thing that would make me at peace at the moment , which was speaking to my Lord in tahajjud.

I carefully began praying and when I fell into sujood , I couldn't help but burst into tears while praying for Ya Allah to grant me forgiveness. I prayed for him to make me and my family closer to him.

I prayed for him to protect my iman from all worldly distractions. I thanked him for protecting me and my family, for not making us stray away from the right path. I made salawat for the prophet [SAW]. I asked for Allah to grant me and my family guidiance and steady our iman. I asked of him to give us the best of the best and make all that we need good for us.

After pouring out my heart to my lord on sujood I stood up and proceeded to finish up my salat. I have absolute trust in Allah that he would grant all my prayers because he is Al Wahab [ The giver] as he was the one who bestowed on me the knowledge and faith to ask him. Allah knows all our wishes and if he won't grant it for me then he wouldn't have bestowed on me the faith to ask him.

I felt much better knowing that I had just spoken to my lord. I looked up to see eman staring at me with sleepy eyes, I beckoned for her to come and she came and sat in my lap.

"Mommy why were you crying in prayer" she asked looking up to me with curiosity dancing on her eyes.

" That is because I was asking Allah for forgiveness for all my sins" I replied.

" so you were talking to God ?" She asked and I nodded.

" but you can't see God how do you know he's listening" she asked

" Because he's our lord and he created us, he knows our minds and he has created different ways for us to speak to him.

" Sujood is one of the ways , anytime you're in sujood just remember that it us a chance for you to speak to your creator" I said and she nodded.

" so then why do you pray in the middle of the night, we only have five daily prayers , did you forget to pray isha" she asked and I couldn't help but smile at how smart she'd grown up to be.

" The prayer in the middle of the night is called tahajjud , it is not compulsory but anytime you want to talk to God or ask him for something , you pray tahajjud" I explained.

" but why in the middle of the night" she asked.

" because at this time Allah Azzawajal comes down close and at this time Allah as given everybody a chance to ask him for anything and he will grant it " I said

" but why is it that when you ask God for something it doesn't happen sometimes and sometimes it takes a very long time " she asked and I smiled.

" That is because Allah is our creator and he knows what is best for us , not everything we ask for is good for us and sometimes it may not be good for us at that time so God gives us when the time is right for us. He protects us from a lot of misfortunes because he knows all our destiny and future. We humans cannot see the future so sometimes we blindly ask for things that may not be good for us " I explained