i see you

A donna in canada

Evangelia:
Isla called me first thing in the morning. I woke up alone today, so having someone too talk too while being in pain is nice I guess.

"Hey, so I wanted to talk too you about something" oh not what I was expecting.

"Sure"

"I know having a fully white cake is like a thing. But I want it too be baby pink too. What do you think?"

"Uh yeah sure, pink is cute" I say hesitantly. I wasn't expecting a call about her wedding cake.

"Okay , also can you fly out tomorrow to try bridesmaids dresses?"

"No sorry-"

"What can be more important than my wedding right now? Please just come. I'm super stressed about getting everything ready in the next month."

"I'm sorry but I can't do-" she doesn't let me finish once again

"Angie I'm a stressed bride! I need you here tomorrow."

"And I am telling you that I can't! Isla I'm laying in bed in so much ducking pain that I want too cry, I've had the toughest time of my life in these last couple of days. And you can't even send a text too check in on me! And you're saying that it's more important to try on dresses than my health"

"What could you possibly be so stressed about! You don't have too plan a fucking wedding in a month do you?"

"Are you kidding me? Have you not seriously read even one of the texts I've sent you in the past days? Are you that self absorbed right now?"

"I've been busy!"

"Good too know" and I hung up.

I can't do that right now. I knew I was going to be in pain and all that. I mean I would probably have the abortion either way. I do my research before I make a decision.

That is not what's hurting me. And I think I've sent her 50 messages and called at least 20 times. And she's been too busy all of those times. But I've made sure too update her on text in case she could at least find time too read them.

I'm gonna be honest I'm not a fan of her being engaged too him. But if this is what she wants I will stand at her wedding. I take time out of my busy day. Running different companies and doing 70 different things everyday. Because she is my friend. If she calls about something urgent or painful I will answer and talk too her.

All I wanted was that back. This is the one time I try too reach out and ask for support. And she can't even acknowledge me trying or me at all. I know she's happy and in love and excited. I'm not standing in the way of that. But I need my friend, I really do. All I wanted was 5 minutes.

And maybe some respect that I'm here in pain. I would fly out there with broken ribs but this pain is something fucking else. It hurts like a bitch in my uterus and in my heart and mind. She can't respect that and it hurts.

But like I said I love her, I love her more than most things in my life.

————-
I've felt like shit all day, and I'm tired of it soooooo. An everything shower is on the schedule for today. I also asked Noah too but everything good from the store. When I don't know what I want I just tell him too but everything I like so I can decide.

Everything showers are the most peaceful thing in the world. Good music, you feel clean and smooth and just fresh in all ways. This is one of the things that makes me love being a woman. Getting ready with your girlfriends and wine and good music before going out is more fun than going out. These are thing guys don't really do. They fix their hair and get changed then leave.

Like that's fun. No I love the bond of getting ready together. Or girls date night! When you get together with your friends and have a date. Like cooking or a walk or a restaurant or a Tivoli. It's just different. Sometimes I want too know what guys do at their get togethers then I remember that they are guys. Suddenly all they do is of no interest too me.

While I'm in the shower I hear something.

Or Someone...

Not funking today, nope. It's not Noah, I recognize his footsteps. It sounds like a female. A bit tall.
Is it? Nooo! Could she get her in this time frame?
Yeah it's possible, but no!

I grab a towel and get out of the shower. I always hide a knife in one of the drawers in the bathroom. So I grab that one and hide it behind my back. And sneak out. It's like a ducking bind movie or some hair like that.

"It's just me Angie" she really flew here. Hmmm

"What do you want" I tell Isla as I enter the kitchen.

"I'm sorry, I've been a bad friend." I stare at her as I out the knife down.

"You know what, yeah. I understand and respect that your busy. But cutting out all contact with your friends and only calling when you need something is a bitch move. And it's just rude." She looks down in shame.

"I know, nothing I say can excuse it. The only thing I can do is say I'm sorry and take the feedback and use it. I want too do that! I've been caught up in my mind. And I forgot that I have too be a friend too. I love you and I'm sorry." I nod

"I read the messages and listened too the voicemails and I sorry, I'm really sorry you're going through all of this."

"Yeah me too" I don't know if I can just let it go. I love her and she's my best friend. But I should be aloud too be mad for a while without being a bitch. Sometimes you have too be mad. That doesn't mean you can't enjoy your time. Just that you don't figure and forget too quickly.

"You hurt my feelings. I reached out to you and you weren't there." I say while tears start too fall down my cheek.

"I really needed you" and I'm fully crying.
She grabs a hold of me and just hold me. I'm not needy but sometimes you just need that one person. When different things happen you call different people. Of course Noah is the one I need and want all ways. Through everything. But sometimes there's one person you need more in certain circumstances. She is on of those people in this situation.

"I know Angie, I'm sorry amore! I really really am. I'm here now and I want too be here. I really do, if you let me. Then I can stay a couple days." I just nod.

—-
A/N
Sometimes friends have a rocky road. Make sure to check in on your therapist friend if you haven't today!

Love you all

Word count: 1199