18. Harry

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She opened up a lot more than I expected

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She opened up a lot more than I expected. Hell, it's a lot more than she expected. I was so proud of her though. I know saying what she did was not easy but she did.

I wasn't too well versed in Bi-polar disorder. If i'm being honest I always thought it was the way it was portrayed in movies or entertainment as being happy one second and mad the next. But that's not what it is at all. At least not for Cammy.

It seems that she went through cycles of depression and mania and what she called "normal". Her normal times were what I've experienced her in. She still has anxiety but it isn't coupled with depression or mania. At least not to the same degree as when she is in a cycle.

Her depressive cycles can last 3-6 months.

While I knew that was a long time it didn't discourage me at all. I still cared for her and wanted to be with her. This new revelation didn't make me feel any differently about her.

I did as much research on bi-polar as I could so I could understand the disorder more.

I know she said she could feel the cycle starting and I wondered how soon that would be? I read that exercise can help, and by exercising, I mean walking. I doubt pushing someone to go to the gym during their depression is super helpful.

I also know depression can make just taking a trip to the bathroom seem like a lot of work.

I wanted us to get in a simple routine of taking 30 minute walks a day. I think being in the fresh air and being together, even if we aren't talking, will be a good thing for both of us. It will help her clear her mind and I'll get to be with her so it's a win-win.

I don't really know how bad her depression gets though, I'm sure each day will be different and we'll take it moment by moment.

I suppose this is a good time to be thankful we are neighbors, if she needs I am literally a few steps away.

Ever since Sunday though I have been spending a lot more time at her house. I even slept over again on Tuesday. I just liked being there and holding her and having late night conversations with her.

It was at night she was the most talkative and wanted to open up so those were my favorite moments.

"I actually really like David," She said snuggling deeper into my side.

"Really?"

"Yes, I like how he talks. He's so sure of who he is and I think that's admirable."

"I really like hearing that. He's been my best friend for 5 years and I guess I always worry people will judge him for his outspokenness. I think it's my favorite thing about him, you're right. He knows who he is and that is admirable."

"Well, anyone who makes him feel less than can fuck off," she said making me laugh. "I'm serious. David is a special guy."

"He has a partner, well, I don't think they're official but I think it will happen soon."

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