013 | not gonna watch the stars.

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Reggie stayed in his usual spot on the rocking chair on the porch after his argument with daryl

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Reggie stayed in his usual spot on the rocking chair on the porch after his argument with daryl. again, like always, he was staring off into the distance. sometimes when reggie stared off into the distance like that, he'd think about a whole bunch of stuff that he usually wouldn't think about. he'd think an awful lot about little, silly things that came to his mind in those moments of peace. like, what would happen if a big black hole came and swallowed him up. since he was little, he'd always liked the idea of space, and all the stars that were up there, and how humans definitely weren't the only life out there. if the solar system was so big, how would it be that humans were the only ones lucky enough for life?

a week after reggie and maggie turned eight, their mom died. their dad and beth's mom told them that she just got too tired, and when people got too tired, sometimes they just went to sleep forever. a perminant sleep in space, that's what hershel said. reggie always remembered the feeling he had in his stomach when his dad said that. when he got older, he came to understand that their mom had killed herself. she didn't go for a permanent sleep in space like he had believed before. she had just given up. anyway, reggie took the loss of their mom harder than maggie did. maggie had stuff to help her get her mind away from it. she had friends, she always got invited to sleepovers, and birthday parties. reggie didn't. he'd never had friends, only ashley, but her mom would never let her hang out with reggie, because he was a little too 'feminine.'

after that, reggie spent most nights on the porch, in that same rocking chair, looking up at the sky and trying to spot shooting stars, or a star brighter than all the other ones. he always believed the brightest star in the sky was his mother. she used to tell him that the north star would always guide him home. she turned into his north star. she would always guide him home. it was hard to ever get little reggie off the porch and into his bed. hershel and beth's mom, annette, would have to wait for reggie to fall asleep on the porch, so they could bring him in and put him in his bed.

that went on for three weeks before annette bought reggie a pack of glow in the dark stars to stick on the roof in his bedroom. winter was coming around, and they didn't want reggie getting sick by falling asleep on the porch all the time. so instead, reggie would lay in the warmth of his bed and stare at the stars on his ceiling, instead. it worked, they managed to keep him in his bed every night after that. his fascination with the stars just continued, though, because he believed that one day, he would join his mom back up there. everyone he had ever lost would rejoin in the stars.

"um, reggie?" he was snapped out of his thoughts by a small voice, making him quickly turn to see misty stood there.

"hey, misty." reggie gave her a small smile. "can i help ya?"

"uh..." she shuffled on her feet a little bit, playing with her fingers. "i was wonderin' if sulli had a ball or somethin'. me and teamberton wanna play ball with 'im, but i can't find one."

reggie just smiled lightly, getting up off the chair. "yeah, he's got a whole lotta toys, actually. come this way."

"do you wanna play ball with me? i can't throw a ball that far, an' sulli keeps tryin' to pull teamberton's head off." misty said, as she followed reggie through the living room.

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