Home is not a house

Chapter 78

Tw for this chapter: Hospital, breakdown, fighting and yelling, mentioned feeding tube, mentioned drowning, mentioned cpr, mentioned past death, mentioned past suicide attempts, mentioned dissociation

They sat there for a long time against the wall. Ranboo didn't really know what time it was to begin with, but soon there was light coming through the curtains and Ranboo knew that it was probably around morning.

No one had come to tell them anything.

Ranboo stared forward at the door, waiting for someone to come. But no one did. In fact the next person to walk through the door was Ranboo's mother and father, both of their faces red from crying. This was a surprise that brought Ranboo out of the daze he had been in.

They stepped into the room, looked around and spotted Ranboo and Tommy on the floor. At this point Tommy was asleep against Ranboo's shoulder so Ranboo couldn't move, but the fact that his parents were there surprised him. He never called them, but Phil probably did when Ranboo didn't notice.

"Mom?" Ranboo asked softly, and his mother walked forward quickly. Dropping her purse and coat on the floor and giving him a hug, waking up Tommy slightly. Ranboo didn't want to fully jolt him so he just let his mother hug him.

"Wha?" Tommy mumbled confused. Behind Ranboo's father in stepped Wilbur, who was quick to walk over to Tommy and scoop him up off the floor. His arms rested under Tommy's knees and armpits. Wilbur hoped Tommy would be okay with this, he had never held Tommy like this before.

"Come on Tommy, let's go get some soda yeah?" Wilbur asked, to which Tommy agreed by nodding his head and letting him bring him out of the room. Ranboo's dad sent them a soft smile as they left, an unspoken thank you.

Ranboo was now fully able to hug his mother, and when he did every emotion from the past 12 hours or so came pouring out. The feelings about Tubbo saying he wasn't real after his nightmare, the feelings about Tubbo acting off, the feelings about realizing that Tubbo was drowning himself in the water, the feelings about having to drag Tubbo out of the water and praying that it wasn't too late.

The feelings about having to watch them do CPR on Tubbo because he wasn't breathing.

"I'm sorry, I'm so sorry" Ranboo sobbed in his mother's arms, similar to how he had after everything with Liam. His dad bent down next to them, patting Ranboo's shoulder lightly to let him know that he was right there.

"Sorry for what sweetie?" His mom asked softly. Ranboo let out another choked sob. There was so much to be sorry for, so much he felt like he could have done that he didn't do. If Tubbo died it would be on him, because he didn't do enough.

"I'm sorry that it's just me. I'm sorry that Tubbo isn't here, I'm sorry I didn't do enough." Ranboo sobbed even harder. His dad tightened his grip on his shoulder but said nothing to his son.

"Honey you did enough, it is completely okay. You did enough, I've told you this a million times before." His mom said softly, tears pricking at her own eyes again.

"No, because before Tubbo was here, Tubbo isn't here. I'm sorry he's not here, I wish he was here, I'm so sorry." Ranboo sobbed as his body began to shake, and he let all of himself fall into his mother's arms. She just held onto him tighter, letting him curl into a ball as he sobbed.

"You didn't do anything Boo." She whispered softly. Ranboo just sobbed into himself as he held his long legs close to his chest, head resting in his mother's lap. And even though he had not known her as a child, Ranboo felt like a little kid with his head in his mom's lap. Maybe it was because she made him feel safe and protected.

Or maybe because the last time it felt like the world was crashing down after he lost family was when he lost his dad.

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