When the Sun Begins to Die

Chapter 11

Cadence P.O.V

Josh takes me back to our apartment building to get away from the artificial trees. I wipe my eyes a bit rough to rid them of my tears. The last thing I want is for anyone to see that I was crying.

I head upstairs to our apartment and flop down on my bed. It is at this moment I want to curl up in a ball and disappear.

'I wish that I had never come to The Oasis. If the sun is going to explode then I should be vaporized in its blast. No government invention or plan should interfere with that. I should just leave before I'm kicked out anyway.'

I pull the blankets on my bed up over my head and bury my face into my pillow. This is the closest thing I can do to disappear at the moment.

I don't bother to keep track of time. It doesn't matter to me at the moment. It would just be easier to ignore my own existence.

Suddenly the blankets are ripped off of me and thrown somewhere else. I groan and remain in my ball, refusing to look up. I hear a sigh as I am scooped up out of bed and taken to the other side of the room. I cling to Josh so I won't fall out of his grasp, wrapping my arms around his neck.

"Be happy," he says, rocking for a moment.

I punch his arm. "It's not that simple."

He shrugs, poking my nose. I huff softly, rubbing the tip of my nose for a moment. Josh seems fun and all, and he is helping me feel better, but a small portion of my brain is screaming at me to stop this growing connection so I won't end up hurting him or myself.

'My mind is telling me that I need to stop whatever friendship that is forming with Josh. I have never had a friend in my life and I shouldn't start now. My heart, however, is urging me to keep him close. He is kind and understanding. Normally people aren't like that anymore. My heart has been alone for as long as I can remember and now it is finally starting to crave someone to hold dearly. Now I have an internal battle between my brain and my heart.'

"What makes you happy?" he asks.

'What makes me happy? To others, this would be a simple question, but to me, this seems like some miscellaneous math problems that I have to solve with no assistance. I'm not sure I ever really allowed myself to be happy either. I shut everyone out and put myself in an emotionless bubble. I'm not sure that allows me to describe myself as ever being happy.'

I simply shrug in response because I don't know what to say. I don't know of anything that makes me happy.

"Well what do you like?" he asks, trying to find anything he could use to make me feel better.

"I like poetry," I say after a moment of thought. 

Josh thinks for a few minutes before finally having his eureka moment. I'm not certain what he's conjured up in that mind of his, but I am curious.

"Um, it's a nursery rhyme, so it's kind of like a poem."

"Tell me," I say softly.

"You are my sunshine,
my only sunshine.
You make me happy
when skies are gray.
You'll never know dear,
how much I love you.
Please don't take my sunshine away."

I smile. I remember that rhyme from my childhood. I read it in a poetry book once. My parents never liked to read to me.

"Thank you, Josh. I feel better now," I tell him, hugging him tightly.

"I'm glad, Cadence. I want you to be happy," Josh says while smiling.

'This is the first time I've been genuinely happy because of someone else. It's a nice feeling. Perhaps my heart will win one argument during my lifetime.'