When the Sun Begins to Die

Chapter 20

Cadence P.O.V

Neither Josh or I saw any more animals as we walked. I do not believe there are many animals anywhere in The Oasis. I'm even starting to believe that the baby birds we heard weren't real. We never saw them because the nest was too high. It could have just been a speaker that played bird calls to make the forest seem more realistic.

I sigh softly as Josh and I walk out of the forest and back to the apartment. It seems as though the more I go out of the apartment the more I want to escape The Oasis. Of course, this is like trying to escape reality; there is no way out.

I lay down in my bed and take out my phone, writing about my day. I tried to leave, punched the mayor, talked to Josh, and then we took a walk through the woods. I wish I could say that this was some sort of average Tuesday. Nothing is average anything anymore.

I set my phone on the bedside table and stare at the ceiling. The Oasis feels plain and boring. There is nothing for me to do that doesn't involve going outside and interacting with people. I would rather stay in the apartment all day.

Josh glances at me from time to time. I'm not exactly sure why. Perhaps he wants to talk but doesn't want to say anything. I'm not exactly sure. After a few more moments he finally speaks.

"If you could've actually left, would you?" he asks softly, looking at me while hugging his pillow.

'I should have known this question would come up eventually. I even asked myself. Would I actually leave Josh alone in here? Would I be able to go on by myself out there? There were too many questions that I didn't ask myself. I just wanted to leave. I still don't know if I actually would have.'

"I don't know. I wanted to leave so no one would get hurt, but I don't know. I wasn't allowed to leave, so there is no way to know for sure," I tell him.

"The doesn't answer the question, that's you avoiding it. Would you have really left?"

I run my fingers through my hair and sigh, looking down at the floor. This is a difficult thing for me to admit. I don't know what Josh will think. I just need to get it over with.

"I wanted to leave before anyone got close to me. I've always shut everyone out. You're the first person I've ever gotten close to before. I don't think I would be able to leave without you," I say softly.

Josh gets up out of bed after that. I am unsure of what he is doing until he pulls me into a hug. I slowly hug him back and sigh, resting my face against his chest.

'I knew I wouldn't be able to cut out Josh. I'm already too involved. There is no going back now.'