When the Sun Begins to Die

Chapter 52

Cadence P.O.V

I refused to go to the infirmary when Josh demanded I go. I've been sick for weeks now and it hasn't gotten any better. If anything, it's gotten worse. I feel miserable but I still do not want to go to the infirmary.

'I have to be sick. It'll pass soon. There's no way that it won't. It has to. I can't be sick forever. Surely it'll be over by the end of the week.'

I curl up under the covers on my bed and sigh. Josh is at the infirmary so I don't have to deal with him at the moment.

Josh has been very worried about my well-being ever since I first got sick. He's probably paranoid because he works at the infirmary.

I hold my stomach lightly from the pains I've been having lately. It's like bad cramps, but not exactly the same. I know that if I tell Josh that he will only continue to worry and pressure me to seek help.

After a while of resting, I hear the door open and glance up, seeing Josh walk in. I roll my eyes and look back down towards the floor.

"Cadence, I'm really worried about you," he says softly, "please go to the infirmary."

"No," I say flatly.

"Please."

"I said no," I tell him again.

"What if there's something wrong?" he asks, a concerned tone in his voice.

"Oh fucking well. It's not like there's anything to live for in this godforsaken bubble," I finally snap.

After I say that I look at Josh and see the pain in his eyes. He looks very hurt and the tears forming in his scream to be released.

"Cadence," he says softly, sitting on the edge of my bed, "please don't say that. I need you, even if you don't want to be with me. I can't imagine my life without you being somewhere in it. Please don't leave me," he begs, grabbing my hand.

As badly as my mind screams to escape his touch, my heart has been longing for his soft embrace. I've missed it and it's never felt so loving. It just feels right. I can't bring myself to pull away.

I sigh and pull him closer to me. He seems confused but allows me to pull him.

"You sappy little fuck," I mumble, resting my head on his chest.

For some reason, I feel better around Josh. I don't feel as miserable and my stomach pain eases. The suffering stops for a short while until I finally bring myself to push him away. This time I don't. I don't want that feeling of misery to come back.

"I meant it," he tells me.

I hit him gently, making him huff. "Shut up."

"Why? I meant what I said. I would be miserable without you in my life."

I sigh and roll my eyes. "Josh, you and I, this just isn't going to work. Get over me so you can be happy with someone else," I tell him.

"I'm never getting over you, Cadence. I'll always love you."

'That's what I was afraid of. Josh is going to be miserable for the rest of his life because of me.'