I Fall Apart ♢ Max Verstappen

ᴄʜᴀᴘᴛᴇʀ 40

♪ I'm starin' at the same four walls in a different hotel
It's an unfamiliar feelin' but I know it so well ♪

Max Verstappen POV

The moment I got inside the paddock I saw every camera on me and I knew I made the right decision to leave Em with my mom, she begged us and I wouldn't feel good with all this on her. I held on to Mia's hand, ensuring I never lost her in the confusion. I understand the chaos but I need to keep her safe.

"Is there another Verstappen on the way?" I hear Daniel ask in a playful tone and Mia laughs.

"Are you calling me fat Ricciardo?" Mia asks and I knew she wanted to prank him.

"Oh. No! I would never do that. I- I thought you were pregnant. Max- He commented something when we were playing and I believed him. I'm so sorry" He says stuttering and clearly nervous. Mia just starts laughing and gives him a pat on his back.

"There is a mini Max on the way. He will be the Formula 1 champion in 2040" Mia says happily.

"It's a boy? That is so great. I and Heidi saw a store with great clothes. I will tell her to stop by and buy a lot of stuff for him" He says excitedly.

"Who are we buying stuff for? Is anyone's birthday coming up?" I hear Lando asking as he arrived to our side.

"I'm buying cute clothes for the baby boy they are going to have" Daniel says and Lando's eyes shine.

"I will buy him a lot of toys. When is he supposed to be born?" Lando asks excitedly.

"Between the end of July and the beginning of August" I say and he nods happily.

"He is going to be the cutest" Lando says excitedly while we walked through the paddock.

"Who is going to be the cutest?" Charles asks with Carlos by his side. Is everyone this noisy in here?

"You love gossip, don't you?" I ask and Charles shrugs.

"You are one of the worse, don't come at me, I'm just trying to keep myself up to date" Charles says nonchalantly.

"Their mini Max is going to be cutest when he is born in a few months" Daniel says and Charles nods.

"Oh, he is definitely going to be the cutest on the grid. The champion of the next generation" Carlos says excitedly.

We got to the Red Bull garage and while I prepared for the race I saw Mia talking with Christian. I noticed he was trying to see how she felt and how it was going before coming back to my side.

"So, a boy uh?" He says and I smile.

"A healthy baby boy" I say and he smiles proudly.

"I hope that he likes motorsports and is as good as his dad" He says and I shrug.

"I won't make it a priority or obligation but I know growing up here will make us love this. The adrenaline and the environment in itself are something impossible to find in other sports. Motorsports have their own world. I will let him dive into it and I will guide him if he wants but I won't do what was done to me. Never." I say and he nods clearly proud.

"You've become a good man and you will know how to raise Em and your son. Nobody will compare you to him. You are your own person and a very good person, let it go" He says and I nod before getting back to talking with my engineer about some details.

"I'm going to get some water, want something?" Mia asks and I shake my head.

Testing is always pretty chaotic so this weekend was chaos. What is good about this is that next week we have the first race here in Bahrain and we can get some less intense days here. I can see the pride in Mia's eyes every time I look at her, I know she is proud of me, she is the only person who made me not want to give up on this. She always told me I was good enough, she told me how talented I am and that I am not useless or a failure.

I made it through hell because of her, I owe it all to her, she is the most amazing person I've ever known. I always knew she would be a great mother and now that I've seen her as a mom, I am absolutely sure she is. She is the one for me, she is my person. In the middle of all the hate I get, I almost immediately forget it when I look at her.

Emilia is just like her mom in so many things and I thank god for that. I know I have a tough personality, I'm hard to deal with and I am too hotheaded and straightforward so I can only wish our kids don't get those things from me. Even though I don't want them to be as stubborn as Mia is.

"What are you thinking about for so long?" I hear Mia ask. I look back and see her joining me on the balcony of our hotel room.

"How lucky I am to have you back. I didn't mean to wake you up" I say hugging her and she rests her head on my chest.

"I was woken up by the lack of you in the bed" She says letting out a laugh.

"I will order room service, what do you want for breakfast?" I ask and she shrugs.

"The usual babe" She says heading to the bathroom while I ask for the food because I knew she never ordered anything. This woman is great but she has some social anxiety about making calls and all that.

"Come here" I say opening my arms, she hugs me quickly making me smile. I love this woman.