Chapter 151 - Percy - We Have a Lesson Led by a Giant

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"Hem, hem."

Professor Umbridge had arrived. She was standing a few feet away from Harry, wearing her green hat and cloak again, her clipboard at the ready. Hagrid. who had never heard Umbridge's fake cough before, was gazing in some concern at the closest Thestral, evidently under the impression that it had made the sound.

"Hem, hem."

"Oh, hello!" Hagrid said, smiling, having located the source of the noise.

"You received the note I sent to your cabin this morning?" said Umbridge, in the same loud, slow voice she had used with him earlier, as though she were addressing somebody both foreign and very slow. "Telling you that I would be inspecting your lesson?"

"Oh, yeah," said Hagrid brightly. "Glad yeh found the place all righ'! Well, as you can see-- or, I dunno--can you? We're doin' Thestrals today--"

"I'm sorry?" said Professor Umbridge loudly, cupping her hand around her ear and frowning. "What did you say?"

Hagrid looked a little confused.

"Er--Thestrals!" he said loudly. "Big--er--winged horses, yeh know!"

He flapped his gigantic arms hopefully. Professor Umbridge raised her eyebrows at him and muttered as she made a note on her clipboard: "Has... to... resort... to... crude... sign... language."

"Well... anyway..." said Hagrid, turning back to the class and looking slightly flustered, "erm... what was I sayin?"

"Appears... to... have... poor... short... term... memory," muttered Umbridge, loudly enough for everyone to hear her. Draco Malfoy looked as though Christmas had come a month early; Hermione, on the other hand, had turned scarlet with suppressed rage.

"Oh, yeah," said Hagrid, throwing an uneasy glance at Umbridge's clipboard, but ploughing on valiantly. "Yeah, I was gonna tell yeh how come we got a herd. Yeah, so, we started off with a male an' five females. This one,' he patted the first horse to have appeared, 'name o' Tenebrus, he's my special favourite, firs' one born here in the Forest--"

"Are you aware," Umbridge said loudly, interrupting him, "that the Ministry of Magic has classified Thestrals as "dangerous"?"

Hagrid chuckled.

"Thestrals aren' dangerous! All righ', they might take a bite outta yeh if yeh really annoy them --"

"Shows... signs... o... pleasure... at... idea... of... violence," muttered Umbridge, scribbling on her clipboard again.

"No--come on!" said Hagrid, looking a little anxious now. "I mean, a dog'll bite if yeh bait it, won' it--but Thestrals have jus' got a bad reputation because o' the death thing--people used ter think they were bad omens, didn' they? Jus' didn' understand, did they?"

Umbridge did not answer; she finished writing her last note, then looked up at Hagrid and said, again very loudly and slowly, "Please continue teaching as usual. I am going to walk," she mimed walking (Malfoy and Pansy Parkinson were having silent fits of laughter) "among the students" (she pointed around at individual members of the class) "and ask them questions." She pointed at her mouth to indicate talking.

Hagrid stared at her, clearly at a complete loss to understand why she was acting as though he did not understand normal English. Hermione had tears of fury in her eyes now. Alex had balled her fists, only stopped from punching Umbridge by Jason, who was holding her back by the wrist.

The Thestrals were finally starting to lose their nervousness. Which meant that Alex and I were flocked by three each. 

'Son of Poseidon!' one said, delighted.

"Alright, alright," Alex was saying, clearly laughing now, "calm down."

A thestral had put it's jaw on Alex's shoulder, and the others were brushing against her legs, softly whispering praises.

I turned to the three in front of me. The thestral grinned with very lethal looking teeth. I snorted, brushing it's leather coat with my hands. 

"Erm... anyway," Hagrid was saying, clearly struggling to regain the flow of his lesson, "so --Thestrals. Yeah. Well, there's loads o' good stuff abou' them..."

"Do you find," said Professor Umbridge in a ringing voice to Pansy Parkinson, "that you are able to understand Professor Hagrid when he talks?"

Just like Hermione, Pansy had tears in her eyes, but these were tears of laughter; indeed, her answer was almost incoherent because she was trying to suppress her giggles.

"No... because... well... it sounds... like grunting a lot of the time..."

Umbridge scribbled on her clipboard. The few unbruised bits of Hagrid's face flushed, but he tried to act as though he had not heard Pansy's answer.

"Er... yeah... good stuff abou' Thestrals. Well, once they're tamed, like this lot, yeh'll never be lost again. 'Mazin' sense o' direction, jus' tell 'em where yeh want ter go--"

"Assuming they can understand you, of course," said Malfoy loudly, and Pansy Parkinson collapsed in a fit of renewed giggles. Professor Umbridge smiled indulgently at them and then turned to Neville.

"You can see the Thestrals, Longbottom, can you?" she said.

Neville nodded.

"Who did you see die?" she asked, her tone indifferent.

"My... my grandad," said Neville.

"And what do you think of them?" she said, waving her stubby hand at the horses, who by now had stripped a great deal of the carcass down to bone.

"Oh, fine, I'll let him know!" Alex was giggling and grinning madly now. A few of them neighed in delight. 

"Erm," said Neville nervously, with a glance at Hagrid. "Well, they're... er... OK..."

"Students... are... too... intimidated... to... admit... they... are... frightened," muttered Umbridge, making another note on her clipboard.

"No!" said Neville, looking upset. "No, I'm not scared of them!"

"You're kind of like my old friend," I told a thestral. "His name was Blackjack."

The thestral neighed joyfully, and bowed down. 'It would be my honor.'

I grinned at Alex, and to my joy, she grinned back at me. 

Hagrid was almost in shock. 

"Not now," Alex whispered to the horse. "Later."

Umbridge was looking at her with wide eyes. As Alex patted it's head, the professor approached her. "Marine, how do you find Professor Hagrid's teachings?"

"You're asking me because I'm new?" Alex smiled. 

"I could always use some insight," Umbridge said sweetly.

"I think thestrals are cool, yeah," Alex said, rubbing the horse's side. "They can take care of themselves, and they've got a mean sense of humo- cleanliness. I was about to say cleanliness."

Umbridge scribbled another note.  "Well, Hagrid," she turned to look up at him again, speaking once more in that loud, slow voice, "I think I've got enough to be getting along with. You will receive" (she mimed taking something from the air in front of her) "the results of your inspection" (she pointed at the clipboard) "in ten days' time." She held up ten stubby little fingers, then, her smile wider and more toadlike than ever before beneath her green hat, she bustled from their midst, leaving Malfoy and Pansy Parkinson in fits of laughter, Hermione actually shaking with fury and Neville looking confused and upset.

"Not bad for a lesson," Alex and I said together.

"They're not bad," Jason nodded, patting a thestral on it's head. "I kind of like them."

"He says he likes you too," Alex translated, grinning.

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