They Rely On Hope. What Do I Rely On? - Tommyinnit Adoption AU

Chapter 54

Tommy sat, curled up in a ball, virtually unmoving for what seemed like an eternity as he tried to wrap his mind around what was happening. The only movement he made was the uncontrollable shaking caused by the mix of pure terror and wrenching sobs. He didn't know what was making him cry, but he guessed it was the terror.

Tommy could feel the danger surrounding him. He knew at any moment Eret could switch up, get sick of his crying, realise he's not worth it, get bored, and then it was over. At any moment he could have a fist in his face. At any moment it could get worse. Tommy was hyper aware of any movement anyone made, even his terror stricken, exhausted, broken state, he knew every movement. Every time Eret came closer, he knew.

Eret kept promising protection, kept asking how he could help, kept reminding Tommy that he wasn't alone, but Tommy was alone. That was the problem. He was always alone. He couldn't not be. If he trusted anyone, it would just hurt 10 times more, and Tommy couldn't bring himself to let that happen.

Eventually Tommy must've cried himself to sleep, exhaustion having absolutely filled him for far too long, because he felt a light tap on his shoulder wake him. He scrambled away instantly, trying to escape, but Eret just insisted that he was safe and passed Tommy a bowl of broth.

"I'm not as good as Niki at cooking, but you need something to eat," Eret smiled gently, passing Tommy a spoon. Cautiously, Tommy took the bowl and spoon, curling up around it as he ate. The first spoonful he tasted with care, checking for any scent that could be dangerous. Over the years Tommy had gotten somewhat good at recognising dangerous scents in foods. Things that signalled that the food had been messed with, and was a risk to him if he ate it. This had no scent like that, it seemed to be a plain chicken broth.  He ate it, knowing he'd need all his strength to work out what to do next.

"Can you tell me what happened?" Eret asked once Tommy had finished. Tommy's shaking has mostly dissipated, and he'd stopped crying which was something. He took a deep breath, deciding what he should say.

"I got held back at school, then got held back even more at the shops, and I have a time I have to be back at the house by, and I had missed that, and I can't go back there. Please, I can't go back, I can't. Please," Tommy said, trying to stay calm, only for the panic to overtake his voice.

"I'm not going to send you away Tommy, you're safe here, and you can stay as long as you want, I just want to make sure you are safe."

Tommy wanted to scream. He wanted to scream a thousand times again. He wanted to scream from the pain. He wanted to scream from the fear, but most of all he wanted to scream because he had no idea what he was supposed to do. He had no idea what he was supposed to think. He had no idea what the rules were. He had no idea what it would take for Eret to turn on him. He had no idea what corner danger lurked behind. He hated it.

"Is there anything I can do for you?" Eret asked for perhaps the hundredth time that afternoon. Tommy didn't know why she bothered. He had never been able to tell her what he wanted or needed, and he never would. He didn't know why she was still trying to trap him with that cruel, cruel question.

"I'm ok," Tommy murmured, wondering if next time she asks him that question he might work up the courage to ask to call Puffy. Probably not.

Eret kept trying to get information out of Tommy, and Tommy kept shutting her down. He knew it was a dangerous balance between Eret noticing Tommy was shutting his questions down, and Tommy admitting to needing help. He was pretty sure he had his balance, but one wrong move could cause him to fall.

Eventually Eret let him rest, although he still seemed worried, he also seemed like he didn't want to ask to much when Tommy wasn't answering. Tommy couldn't tell if it was all an act or not, but at least she wasn't hurting him. Eret showed him the way to the guest bedroom, and promised he would be there if Tommy needed him. Then he left, leaving Tommy alone in relative safety.

Tommy let himself curl up under the covers, hidden safely from the world. He wondered how long he'd stay here. He wondered how long until he would call Puffy, or more importantly, how long he'd survive before he needed to call Puffy. He wondered if Dream would come after him or just take the loss. He didn't know, and he hated that. He had always preferred predictability. If he knew something would happen, he could avoid the worst and deal with the stuff that wouldn't kill him. That was why he had come to Eret, avoiding the worst and dealing with the threat that isn't a certainty.

Tommy lay there, achingly quiet for a long time, listening to the sounds of Eret moving around. She didn't seem to be able to stay still for more then a minute. Either she was nervous about something, which presented the risk that she'd take it out on Tommy, or she thought she was in danger, which risked her attacking Tommy thinking it was in self defence.

At some point Ranboo arrived, and the two went outside. Tommy could hear their voices as they talked but he couldn't make out the words. He wondered how much danger that might mean that he's in. They could be talking about him, or they could just be talking, he just didn't know.

Words: 1000

A/n: this is probably a very poorly edited one,vI edited it while I was virtually falling asleep (cuz it was late) so yeah... pls point out errors of wierd parts so I can fix the,, thank uuu