Finding Elliott [Harry Styles] Completed

Thirtyone.

A/N - CUTENESS OVERLOAD

After my father left I was alone, something had been accustomed to recently. 

I have to admit being alone was not good for me right now. Being alone gave me time to think about things and I didn't want to think about anything. 

Right now I had to trust my father not to say anything to Jessica. I knew it was going to be hard for him, I knew he'd be stewing on every single word I had told him. I just wanted to deal with it myself. I guess when I had told my father I wanted to be the one who sorts this problem out he must have thought I was crazy. Recently a lot of people had been thinking I was, I didn't even care though. I knew I could deal with her weak ass, I had done things I wasn't proud of but it just meant I was stronger than I believed. 

The hospital was quiet at night, I managed to leave my bed and sit in the window watching the world go by. It was dark outside as it was almost midnight but things out there were not calm. I could see ambulances arriving, people bringing in the sick and injured keeping the hospital grounds alive. 

I wondered if it was always this busy, I didn't care, I was just glad to be able to see people so I didn't feel so alone.

My attention was drawn to the door when I heard it opening, I looked over towards the door with wide eyes as the light flooded the dark hospital room before I squinted my eyes then I saw Harry standing there. Everything about him was normal, his leather jacket, the white tee, the black skinny jeans, the combat boots and the thin line of his lips as he stared at me. "What are you doing here?" I asked him as he entered the room and closed the door behind him. 

The room was totally dark now since the light had disrupted my vision. I blinked a few times as I heard him moving closer to me, his boots stomping across the floor. "I needed to see you." His voice was hoarse and quiet as he moved closer.

I returned my eyes to the window so I could see something again, my eyes focusing on the lights far away. "You've seen me, you can leave now." I didn't mean to be so cruel, I just didn't want any more heartache, I'd had too much in my small lifetime and just looking at this man made me feel like my insides were breaking. 

"Are you okay?" He asked making me jump as I realised he was so close to me, his voice basically in my ear as a whisper. 

Turning back to face him I found his face mere inches from mine, the darkness growing on me as I could see every feature of his face, his bright green eyes staring into mine, his thin lips closed and in a thin line, the bags under his eyes due to recent events. I couldn't believe he was right here right now with me. I wanted to get up and run away from him, not because I was scared of him, I was scared of the things he made me feel, I was scared of the things I felt I could do when he was around, he made me feel free, he made me feel normal.

"What are you really doing here?" I asked him again my voice barely auditable. My breathing was slow as I stared at him, he was mesmerizing, there was something about him, something about the way he just looked at me.

He reached forward with his right hand that gently caressed my face, his touch was gentle, it was moments with him like this that made me want to melt into him and just run away with him, I didn't want this to end. I closed my eyes as I leaned into his touch, I didn't even care if I looked like an idiot, it had been so long since I had experienced a loving gentle touch. I needed him, I wanted him.

My insides were a mix of sick and mush, when I opened my eyes to look back at him he spoke, "I fell in love with you too."

How did I respond to that? Did he love me now? Did he still feel that way? There were many questions. My breath caught in my throat as I couldn't find any words to say. After all this time here he was telling me that he had loved me too. All that thinking about him was not wasted.

My heart was pounding in my chest as I stared into his emerald eyes, I wanted him so much right now, I needed him. As I moved my face closer to his I looked down at his lips before flickering my eyes back to his eyes, I did this a couple of times before I closed my eyes, our lips just touching at first. My head was spinning, almost like I was dizzy, my heart was banging against my ribcage and my senses were working overtime. 

His lips were soft against mine, not how I imagined them to feel at all. It was just a touch, just a quick taste but it wasn't enough. Pushing myself closer to him I felt all of his lips against mine, my left arm slouching over his right shoulder and my left hand ended up wrapped in his hair. As he took control of the kiss I could feel his hands on me, one hand on left cheek and the other on my right hip as he pulled me closer to him. Something about him tasted amazing, addictive, the taste of blood, mint and smoke all mixed together, somehow it worked and it made me want him all the more.

When we finally pulled apart to get air we leaned our foreheads against each others, our breathing heavy as we stared at each other. "Hi," I smiled at him as I just couldn't believe that he was here with me. I couldn't believe that after all this time everything was falling into place. 

He winked at me before he moved his head away from mine as I caught my breath. He offered me his hand which I placed mine into as he helped me stand, "We better get you back into bed."

"Are you leaving?" I asked him as we walked towards the bed which he helped me climb in as I ignored the pain that seared through my stomach. 

He shook his head as pulled the blanket over my body, "I can stay for a while." I watched as he slipped his boots off and laid on the bed next to me, I was on my back and he was on his left side as he looked at me. Slowly he reached over and using his right hand he took my right hand held his hand over mine before lacing his fingers between mine. 

Turning my head to look at him I couldn't believe we were here, I couldn't believe he was here with me and he was laying in bed with me. "What-"

He cut me off as I tried to ask a question, "Ell, I need to tell you something."

I nodded at him as I waited for him to speak, my question wasn't important anyway, not really. 

"I need you to know I'm so sorry," he told me as he forefinger on his right hand brushed over the top of the blanket where my stomach was. "I didn't-"

Reaching forward with my left hand I put my finger on his lips, "You didn't do this to me. I put myself in the way, I did this to myself." I told him as I reasoned with myself. I really did, I stood in the way of the gun to protect my friend, to protect the one who was protecting me.

"This should have never happened, you shouldn't have ever ended up here." He told me as I laid my left hand back to the side of me, "None of this should have happened."

I smiled at him, "We can't change anything now." I was so grateful to just be here, to just be alive after everything. "I'm here now though, we can change what happens next."

He sighed, "I don't know what happens when we leave this room." As he admitted the words it worried me, was he only here because he felt like he had to apologize? Did he not want to be here with me? What had my father told him about Jessica? Did he know anything and did he believe anything? Was he going to return straight home to Jessica when he left here? These were all questions I didn't have an answer to, these were all things that worried me. 

There were some things I knew would happen when I left this room when I left this hospital. I would return home to my father where I would cast out Jessica one way or another. I would return home and my father would probably never let me leave a normal life again. I would have no real friends that weren't a part of this life that I was now involved in. 

Smiling at Harry again I stared into his beautiful eyes, "We don't have to leave this room right now." My voice was a whisper as I tried to stay calm knowing that this might not happen again depending on what happened when we left this hospital. As I looked at him, a smile creeping across his face, my eyelids started to feel heavy as I felt myself falling asleep.