Love Finds a Way !!!

Chapter 59

Aarav gazed at the rain falling softly from Kanak's balcony. It had almost been a month and a half since he had first met her. He recalled their first meeting and smiled. How had she managed to get under his skin in such a short time? If he was to tell this to anyone they would laugh at him. But the girl had made a place for herself all on her own. Without any help from anyone else. And he was lost.

He had tried. Really hard. But he hadn't been able to stay away. Knowing it was something he wasn't allowed to have. It was something he couldn't feel. And yet. He smiled sardonically. He hadn't forgotten any of the reasons he had given himself over and over again but he couldn't remember a single one when he was with her. Then frowned. What could he do about how he felt? Nothing. It was like a magnetic pull, the harder he tried to stay away the more he found being pulled towards her. He sighed at the irony of his situation. And he momentarily closed his eyes. What was he doing? This was the first time in his life where he didn't know what to do with how he felt. No. Not the first time. The second time. The first had been when he had lost his father. He hadn't known what to do with all the emotions he had gone through that day. He swallowed a lump. And squeezed shut his eyes. Tightly.

"Bad thought?" he heard Kanak ask softly.

Aarav opened his eyes to find her sitting next to him with two steaming mugs of coffee in her hands. Aarav gave her a small smile and took one mug from her. How come he hadn't heard her come in and sit?

"What makes you think that?" he asked as he took a sip from his mug and appreciated the quality of the brew.

"You looked as if in pain," Kanak answered slowly and shrugged.

Aarav hadn't been aware he had let his guard down for a few moments there. Hell, he hadn't been aware of her walking in and taking a seat. Her cottony fragrance or even the strong smell of the coffee she had brought with her, nothing had alerted him to her presence. So maybe he had been too deep in his thoughts. What could he answer to her quietly posed query? He couldn't answer at all. Or he could give her a half answer. But he wanted to talk. It had been a long time since he had spoken of his father. To anyone. And the feeling had been building up. Slowly. Steadily. For some strange reason he wanted to talk to her. About how he sometimes felt. About how he sometimes longed to have his father near him again. What a deep aching loss it had been. It still was.

"I was," Aarav accepted simply.

Kanak looked at him a bit worried. She wasn't sure if he would answer her question. But he had. After a bit of deliberation on his part. He had accepted he had been in pain over whatever he had been thinking. Why? She was concerned. When they had come upstairs he had removed his jacket and she had asked him to sit on the couches. Though Palak's words from the day before echoed in her ears and she had been a bit apprehensive. But he had declined. He had instead walked towards the little enclosed balcony of hers. She had a small but comfortable set up there with floor pillows and a light blanket. And Aarav had immediately decided he wanted to sit there. She had gone to the kitchen to make coffee. When she had returned she had found him sitting on one of the floor pillows with his head thrown back against the wall and eyes closed shut. There was a grimace on his face and he had a deep frown as if he was trying really hard to control the emotion he was experiencing and she had been anxious. Wondering if he had received a call with bad news. But then she had immediately discarded the thought, one because his phone was set on the coffee table of her sitting room and two because he wasn't the type to take bad news sitting down. It had to be something else. And so she had asked.

"You want to talk about it?" Kanak asked with a gentle smile.

Aarav looked at her. And he kept looking for a few minutes. Thankfully, she met his gaze. All he saw was understanding and gentleness. There was no malicious intent on her part to find out what was bothering him. No deceit. No pretensions. Not that he doubted her. She may doubt him still but he...he knew her. And he was never wrong in his readings of others. That is what made him dangerous. He never gave away his thoughts but he read the rest like a pro. It was an acquired talent and one he had very patiently developed during his growing years. A talent that annoyed his entire family too. Even Tanish. Most times. But she was different. He felt different with her. For strangest of reasons he wanted to open up to her. To talk to her. About his dreams, his fears, his losses. Everything. He wanted to be himself around her.