You're Supposed To Be//Billie Eilish

chapter 31

billies pov:

i was panting hard when i pulled back. i needed some air in my lungs. 

kissing will was so worth it though.

wills lips were swollen and her cheeks had a small tint of red on them. her hair was messed up after i had... kinda, maybe, a little bit... tugged on it. 

she liked it though. 

i bit my lip too stop myself from grinning way too hard but i could see in her eyes that she felt the same way. 

she was still in my lap and i hadn't forgotten why i even got here in the first place. she had called me crying and i just knew that what she told me about jessie isn't the only reason therefore. 

"i really liked that."

"we should do it again sometimes then."

she giggled and hid her face in my neck. my hands went up from her thighs to the back of her head, softly stroking her hair. i lightly kissed her ear which caused her to giggle again and wriggle away from my lips. 

"hey, look at me."

i held her cheeks as she looked at me.

"wanna tell me what's going on in that pretty head of yours?"

she let out a sight.

"you don't have to. i just want to help. maybe you'll feel relieved after you get it out, y'know."

"i- where do i start?"

i looked at her, paying close attention to her expression. she was nervous and i saw that she had a fight with herself inside her head, whether to open up or not.

"i-i don't really have much of a family anymore."

she fiddled with her hands in her lap while also looking at them. 

"i have my stepsister, monroe... but that's about it."

a gasp slipped out of her lips and i pulled her into my shoulder when i saw tears wanting to escape as well. 

i caressed the back of her neck to calm her down. 

she didn't deserve this, this hurt she was feeling. 

i didn't want to make any assumptions but something really traumatic must have happened to her or better her family.

i didn't know how to react. i didn't know what to say in this moment. i didn't know if she even wanted me to say anything. because sometimes it's better to just be held. 

i still felt bad. i wanted to say something, just to make her feel heard, to make her feel seen. 

but i just held her. and i think that was okay. 

"i-i'm sorry."

"there's nothing to be sorry for. let it out."

i knew that she was trying to hold back her sobs and cries but it's good to let it out sometimes. in my opinion, crying makes you feel lighter afterwards. but it's also embarrassing to cry in front of other people, i know that all too well from my own experience.

she cried into my shoulder for a few more minutes while i held her the whole time. she slowly calmed down and was now just breathing unevenly. 

"can we talk on on another day? today has just been hard."

"of course. just come to me when you're ready, alright? i wanna make sure you're okay."

she nodded shyly and i followed her eyes on my shirt. it was tear stained and a little bit of snot was there too. 

"sorry."

"don't worry 'bout it. you just gotta give me one of yours."

i grinned widely at the thought of wearing her shirt. i knew that she could read my mind and started smiling too. 

"cutie."

a blush crept up my cheeks when she booped my nose. we got up and i followed her to her room where she looked through her closet for a new shirt.

"you know when you stayed over at mine? and couldn't find your shirt?"

"yeah, i must have forgo-"

i gave her a cocky grin while my face heated up.

"that was you?"

"i took your shirt away so you could wear one of mines. it's embarrassing when i say it out loud."

"it's cute as hell. you're cute as hell."

she smiled widely at me and gave me a shirt of hers.

"it's my favorite one but i'll let you borrow it."

i pouted when she left the room.

she's so adorable.

i changed and threw the top with snot in the laundry basket. i found will in the kitchen looking through the fridge.

"you hungry?"

"very, but i don't wanna cook something complicated. i-i mean... if you want something complicated i can make you some. that's no problem and-"

"no, don't worry."

i chuckled.

"i don't want something complicated. but how about i make some soup? it's easy and fast."

"but you're kinda my guest and i feel bad if you cook for us."

"it's no problem and also, you can help to chop the scallions."

"okay sure."

will put on some music while i boiled some water and put the noodles inside. 

"can you give me the tofu please?"

i asked and will gave me the small pack. our hands brushed against each other and i felt myself blush once again. 

"thanks."

"do you like spice?"

"i love spice."

"good. so i can add a lot of chilli flakes?"

"sure."

we sat down at the table after we finished cooking my infamous rice noodle soup. will got chairs last week so we didn't have to sit on the floor anymore. 

"oh my god, this is so good."

"i know, right?"

i answered cockily and grinned.

"you know what we should do?"

"hmm?"

i took one end of my noodle in my mouth and held the other one up.

"billie, that's so cliche."

she giggled but took the other end in her mouth anyway while i looked into her face. when our eyes met we bust out laughing and the noodle ripped into two pieces.

"oh no."

"no, no. we try again."

i said with enthusiasm. we took another noodle and this time we managed to not rip it into two even though we still couldn't really control our laughing. 

we met in the middle and smashed our lips against each other. i could taste the soup on her tongue when she slipped it inside my mouth. 

i completely forgot that i was leaning all over the table until i hung my hair inside my bowl.

now, that's nice.

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(1010 words)

hi loves. 

next chapter is probably gonna be their date. something you wanna see?

how are you?

<3