Finding happiness (previously known as Billionaire playboy's secret past)

Chapter 22: I introduce to you my brother

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My first camp pre-natal appointment happened so quickly. Mum did not react as badly as I thought she would when I told her that Nora now knew about the pregnancy. She just shrugged and said "as long as you know what you're doing."

On the way to the clinic we were excited like little girls. I guess sharing my secret with Nora wasn't so bad after all. She found interesting and funny ways to make the situation better. We usually talk about what we think the baby will look like. We pick the best features from Knox and some from me, basically he or she will be mostly a Knox because we decided we liked a lot of things about Knox. We also managed to lay to rest the Knox-Nora almost sexual encounter. She still laughs at the hilarity of the situation and how mortified Knox was when he couldn't perform. She says she now believes that Knox can perform seeing that there's evidence growing in me, otherwise she wouldn't have believed it. I can see the funny side of it now and I'm glad it was Nora, even though I hate to think that Knox was willing to go to someone to have sex when I was there.

I already know where the Clinic is because I was here the first week we arrived at the camp. I accompanied Grace to her appointment, surprise, surprise she has an STD, specifically chlamydia. I suspect it wasn't her who contracted this but got infected by her husband. She didn't want me to know for fear of gossip spreading but I heard the nurse tell her that the inflammatory pain she has is the result of the STD. The nurse was trying to gently tell Grace that she needs to consider using condoms with her husband and I could see on Grace's face that it was never going to happen. In the end she just told her if this keeps going; she is vulnerable to contracting AIDS/HIV. With those uplifting words (not) we left the clinic and my hatred for Mahad just grew a little bit more.

On the day I went to the clinic with Nora, she was seeing it properly from the inside for the first time. The clinic is nothing to crow home about. There is a nurses' station/reception and a number of examination rooms. A dispensary is in the front room opposite the reception area, and this is where medication is given out. Towards the end of the hall are the male and female toilets. In the examination room is a little bed and a little table with the medical equipment. After registering myself once again, I was ushered into Exam Room 3. The nurse didn't take long before she was ready to see us. She made me lie on the bed and she moved her hands to my tummy and pressed here and there. Finally she started asking questions about how far along I was and when I told her I was just over 15weeks she seemed to think so as well. She started to tell me what to expect, and the baby movements to look forward to. I left with more vitamins and even more appointments to see her. Every 2 weeks I am to report to the clinic for a check-up.

That was the highlight of my week. We also realised that when we get food rations, it's not as easy as someone coming to your dusty doorstep and dropping off your goods. We had to go and collect the food, basically stand in a line for a long time, show your camp identity cards and then receive some food. Going there with mum wasn't because we couldn't carry the bountiful (sarcasm) amounts that we were receiving but it was so I could see how this works for next time. The food rations have not changed or improved. They're still very little and not nutritious at all. I am going to have to rely on my vitamins for this baby to even have a chance of being healthy. I decided that this was as good a time as any to discuss with mum my brother's upcoming birthday. I was glad that she had the same thoughts as me, give him something he'll love and just give him a good day.

My brother will be turning 7 next week and at the moment he is enrolled at the camp school where he attends class with almost 60 other grade 1 students. The classrooms for grade ones, are just huge tents with a blackboard propped up on a chair. A desk for the teacher and a few plastic chairs are the only furniture in the tent. When the students write, they have to sit on the floor as there are no desks. I also found out from my brother that in grade 1 when they're teaching you to write, they don't just give you a paper and a pencil to write to begin as these are scarce commodities. The children write in the sand so if they make a mistake the teacher comes and corrects them, they erase the mistake and start again. Those who manage to write ok will then be promoted to using paper and pencil. My brother was already good with writing before we left our home so it didn't take him long to graduate to using a pencil and paper.

After a week of using loose paper sheets, he was given a writing book. All the bits of educational equipment are actually donated to the schools by people from overseas. I guess people are generous. When the students are given writing books they are expected to last a certain amount of time before you'll be given another one. If you lose your book or pencil, you'll have to find means to get one, hence lots of theft. The textbooks are no better, for a whole grade, you could find 3 or 4 books. One for the teacher and the rest, the students will share. With that amount of students and a dismal teacher student ratio, it's no wonder many children stop going to school after primary school. Well, that plus if they're girls, they're usually married off as soon as they start menstruating.

My brother is luck in that I continue to teach him when he gets home. I ask him what they learn on a daily basis and I then try and expand, give examples and simplify what the teacher was saying. When he understands something, you see the way his little face lights up.

Once mum agreed that we could get him a little present, we passed through the shops to see what they sold and if there was anything we thought my brother would like. We wouldn't ask him what he wanted because he has a habit of asking for the most expensive things. As soon as I saw the Spiderman t-shirt and a little spider action figure I knew he would love it. Mum being the practical one wanted to just buy the t shirt. She argued that, "he can wear the t-shirts, but what will he do with a toy. Just play and maybe lose it, it's a waste of money."

I have to admit, she had a point but I know if dad was here, he'd be the unreasonable one, like me. We talked about it and in the end, I won the argument and my brother will have both toy and t-shirt for his birthday. We won't bother with cake or any of those things but we will find a way to make it special.

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My brother's birthday came quicker than expected. He woke up very grumpy refusing to go to school and I couldn't be bothered forcing him. Mum wasn't in any good mood either. We may have misjudged how this day was going to affect us without our father. His absence is very clear and there's a gaping hole in my heart that's threatening to swallow the little bit of happiness that I have.

No one says anything about dad, but we're all thinking about his absence. It is only until I go outside to empty the bucket we use as a toilet at night that I saw Nora and she told me off for participating in taking the little joy that this birthday should bring to my brother. I went back inside the tent and made sure I was there for my brother. After a little while we were all laughing and because it was a special occasion, mum just let my brother stay at home. We played inside and I made a few mandazi's (African scones) from the flour that we received this week. These are my brother's favourite and he didn't disappoint with his appetite.

Finally with one last mandazi, we sang happy birthday Christopher, we lit a dry grass stock and asked him to blow and make a wish. It was special. Yes, my brother's name is Mathias Christopher, also known to us as Junior. He was named Mathias after my father. He really does look like my father and some of his mannerisms, like when he rubs his chin when he is thinking hard or lifts one eyebrow when he's silently questioning you. The best part is seeing my brother's face light up when he saw the presents. He's so excited that he jumps up and down as one should when they're excited.

Once he calms down, he clutches his little gifts in his hands and looks at us "But how did you buy these. I thought you didn't have money. That's what you said last week when I wanted to buy lollies"

"Well today is a special day so we had to use the little bit we had to make the day special"

"Are we going to die of hunger, you can take the gifts back so we can have the money back." He says with tears in his eyes.

"No, we're not starving, we just need to be careful on what we spend money on. You can keep your gifts. It's your special birthday my little man." Mum says rubbing his head.

"Ok I promise I won't ask you to buy things for me again. I don't want us to die of hunger." He says seriously.

This is why I love junior, he is so young and yet he reasons better than most adults. I will do anything for this young man.