Behind My Eyes.

trust issues.

it's been a year since we last spoke and i still haven't been able to figure out why you did what you did.

my cheeks still burn hot with embarrassment.

my chest still flares up with anger.

my fists still clench with rage.

i hope one day i'll be able to move past this.

i think i'm angrier at myself because this wasn't the first time you did this to me.

it was the second.

how did i let it happen again?

i thought you'd changed.

it really seemed like you had.

i think of it sometimes and it still makes my head spin.

it's definitely ruined me.

i second guess everything anyone says to me because i can't believe that anyone would be nice to me without ill intentions.

they're just building me up so they can tear me apart as you did.

i'm afraid i'm nothing but a joke to them.

you read about these kinds of games in books and you see them happen in movies but you never think they're real.

you never think someone is cruel enough to do it in real life.

i can't believe that someone that knows the same people i know could act this way.

was that the end goal?

to mess me up so completely that i become a paranoid mess?

i can't take anyone for who they are because i'm scared they'll hurt me like you have.

i can't believe in the few months we knew each other you caused me years of issues.