His Little Bird

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Ethan's POV:

I cradle my Little Bird, my wife in my arms. My mind runs a thousand miles a minute, trying to figure out how to fix this.

I need to fix this.

She needs to stop crying.

I thought she would just give me a hug and tell me she's fine. I want her to get it all out and not hide how she feels, but I didn't mean to have her break into tears.

I can't handle her tears.

Hearing her cry is like nails on a chalkboard.

"It's okay. This is a happy thing?" Birdie doesn't buy it, continuing to cry in my arms.

I wish she would have told me she was upset and why because right now I'm flying blind.

Is she upset I collared her? She can't be. She wanted me to collar her. She was so upset on Monday when I didn't collar her.

Is she upset that I was all handsy with her downstairs? I was a saint compared to her parents, but perhaps she didn't want me touching her suggestively in public.

Maybe she is just overwhelmed? This is a scary thing for subs, being collared. I'm going to take good care of her, but she could have started having some fears.

I still don't know about her past and it seems very traumatic. I feel like I'm running blindly through a minefield. I don't know what to look out for, I just know I have to do something.

"Tell me how to make it better," I plead, ready to gouge out my ear drums, so I can't hear her cry anymore.

"I—I don't want to leave tonight."

Does she think I'm going to do something to her?

I remain silent, petting her hair. I'm not sure what to make of what she wants. We will stay if that is what she wishes, but I want to know her reasoning behind it.

Does she think staying here will prevent me from seeking my marital right from her?

Is that why she wants to stay here?

Is she worried I'm going to hurt her? She freaked out on me the first time she was at my house and all I did was tell her to undress. She probably won't do well at all when we try to have sex...

She's probably not ready and doesn't want to tell me. She probably feels guilty and thinks I'll take her reluctance personally.

I feel responsible for giving her so much stress if that is it, but I do not have hurt feelings at all over her not being ready to get intimate with me yet.

"We don't have to do anything you don't want to, Little Bird. We can just share a bed tonight?" I don't know if I'm offering what she desires, but she seems to contemplate my offer.

"I want to stay here."

I frown at her stubbornness. I can't say I am particularly surprised by it, but I was hoping she would at least open up about her reasoning since she is very insistent on staying here.

"We can stay the night, Little Bird. That isn't an issue at all, okay? I'm sure your parents won't mind." She sniffles and nods, sucking in a deep breath to calm herself down.

"I'm sorry, Ethan."

I kiss her head, continuing to pet her. "You don't have to apologize. It's not a big deal."I peck her lips, hoping to get a kiss from her, but she slightly turns her head away from me.

I stare down at her for a minute, trying to figure out my next move.

She seems mad at me.

Her arms slip around my waist and she turns her head to lay her cheek against my chest. I know her cuddling doesn't always mean I am on good terms in her book, but I take it as a sign that she is okay.