Married To Baseball

Maybe That's It.

Jailyn~

"Are you really not planning on going back to softball?" Christian asks as we get into bed for the night after handling Ryker one last time. I push my hair back and prop my head up on my elbow on my pillow as I look at Christian.

"I don't really know," I tell him, "I don't even know how I could. The next season starts in two months, Ryker is only going to be five months old then. I was planning on feeding him myself until he was able to eat more normal food and that's around six months. Even then though I was thinking until he didn't need formula or anything. Everyone says to do it as long as you can, then I don't want to be trying to wean off of doing it while in season, it's already hard enough going too long without him needing to eat or having to pump or something. I'm also so out of shape but I can't even imagine going to the gym right now still."

"Well, it's not always going to be like that JJ."

"I know," I tell him pursing my lips to the side, "I also don't want to miss anything either. Like he just figured out how to roll over, I don't wanna miss him crawling, or walking, or talking, or just anything. You got it perfect, you didn't miss anything but him sleeping all the time and eating, which is all that he really does still anyways. He can roll over, that's like it and you got to be here for that."

"You know it wouldn't be that bad traveling with you," Christian tells me, "I kinda figured that'd be the plan anyway."

"But traveling with a baby?" I ask raising an eyebrow, "Like getting back to LA was a whole mess of itself and that only like a four-hour flight. I'm regularly on at least nine-hour flights. I don't think it's completely realistic. You can't get like a whole ass private jet either for an international flight."

"I mean we could," Christian points out.

"No we couldn't, it's not nearly as safe and there's so much fucking pollution that would go along with it. I don't want to risk something happening or the kickback of getting a private plane just so I can travel with my kid. Like I'm okay to not go back right now."

"Are you though?" he asks me seriously.

"Babe if I wasn't I wouldn't have been ready to have Ryker and commit to that," I tell him trying to alleviate any apprehension that he has over this right now, "Like I feel pretty secure with being able to come back granted I can produce as I have and it's not exactly something you lose especially if I start heading back into the cages again. I'm thirty, I have a good amount of time left where I can go back."

"So you're not saying never, but not for the time being."

I nod, "I guess that's one way to put it. I'm already more than happy with my career and where it ended if that's how I left it, I'm good."

"I guess that's good enough for me," Christian says with a small smile before holding his arm up for me to scoot closer to him. Giggling a little I shake my head before moving into him as he hugs me before he gives me a small kiss, "I love you."

"I love you too."

~~~~~

"God my boobs get even more in the way than they used to," I comment as I reset to take the next ball off the machine. I feel the familiar rattle of the bat as I make contact sending the ball into the ground. "Definitely still feels good to be back though. Even if it's not back back. "

"You still look good as hell doing it too," Christian replies with a small laugh as he sits on the bench behind the cage rocking Ryker slightly in his car seat. "Everything feeling okay?"

"Yeah," I say with a little grunt as I'm mid-swing, "Apart from the boob thing everything feels good, I'm going to be sore but it's kinda expected when you haven't swung a bat in what, a year now?"

"Give or take, it's been a minute for sure," Christian replies, "Ryks eyes light up and he looks around every time you make contact."

"Well if he's awake you can pull him out, not like there's balls flying around out there or anything," I comment as I take the last swing before the light turns off letting me know I'm out of pitches.

Heading out of the cage I see Christian holding Ryker as Ryk's eyes track me as his little arms wave around excitedly with a massive smile. God, I love him so much. "Hi buddy," I say smiling brightly at my son as I talk to him just as excitedly as he seems to be for me right now. I pull my helmet off and drop it to the floor as I hold my hands out and take Ryker as I make faces at him getting to hear his adorable laugh. We literally couldn't have gotten any luckier with a more perfect baby. I'd be down to have a hundred more if they turned out even half as perfect as him. He's very happy and sweet and very rarely actually cries more than if he needs to eat or be changed. He likes to whine a little when he needs something but he's given us absolutely no trouble in these last five months now. He's even teething and not seeming to be too bothered by it.

"How did we get so lucky to have him be so perfect?" I ask kissing Ryker's nose once making his giggles fill the air. That's even more contagious than Christians smile.

"He's got a pretty perfect mama for starters," Christian tells me with a smile, "And I don't think any kid could be unhappy with how much love he has." Christian tickles Ryker a little with his finger making Ryker tip his whole body towards him as he laughs. I love them both so damn much. "Why don't you show off a little more for us?"

I laugh and hand Ryker back to Christian before leaning and picking up my helmet again and stepping back in the cage. I drop one of the tokens into the machine and get set in my box again watching the dimple ball as it gets dropped in all the way until it connects with my bat as I swing through, damn that felt fucking incredible. Maybe I'll end up back again anyways. 

As I swing through the next one Ryker screams a little pulling my attention to see both Christian and him laughing as he shakes his chubby little arms around excitedly. Then again, this definitely isn't something I want to leave for six months or so a year. 

~~~~~

"C'mon buddy!" I say excitedly as I pat my legs while Ryker leans back and forth a little almost like he's about to crawl. Christian is right by watching with a massive smile on his face before he tosses me one of Ryker's favorite toys. I shake the stuffed octopus towards him the little crinkle of it pulling his attention even more than I was.

"buh, buh, buh," Ryker babbles out loudly, his little hazel eyes lighting up as he smiles even wider with his little bit of drool coming out of his mouth. "Ah ba ba!"

"C'mon buddy! You got it," I tell him smiling just as wide as I can at my beautiful son five months old and just about to crawl. He's hit every milestone early, I guess the little dude wants to take his name seriously. His arrival should've been a warning for how quickly he'd get to things. Hopefully, he'll figure out potty training this quickly too, even if that's still a ways away.

I cheer as Ryker starts moving he gets one hand in front of the other and almost just scoots himself forward a little. He's getting it, "Yeah Ryker! You've got it buddy come to mama! Get your little sailor octoguy, c'mon bud!" Ryk babbles a little more before getting moving and cruising on straight to me. I squeal a little as I scoop him up and hold him tightly hyping him up for his little achievement. "Ryker, Ryker, Ryker, you're so awesome buddy! Good Job!" Christian is laughing just as excited as he comes over to join our small celebration. He gives Ryker a small kiss on his head before leaning in to kiss me. Our perfect little family.

"He's growing so damn fast," I tell Christian as he holds an arm around me while we hang out on the small couch in Ryker's room. "Like he's going to be something incredible one day and he's going to do it quickly that's for sure."

"I know, it's pretty crazy how fast it seems like everything is going," Christian replies, "He's already crawling and he's only five months old like he's going to be an old man by the time he's five."

I can't help but laugh a little at the thought of that even if it's a bit of an exaggeration, "Thank you for helping make that little man, you two are the best things that have ever happened to me."

"Well making him was the fun part even if it got stressful for a little bit," Christian says chuckling slightly, "Maybe that's why he's so quick on picking things up, he's making up for how long it took to make him."

I laugh again, "Maybe that's it," I reply leaning into Christian, "No matter the reason I couldn't ever be happier than I am with the two of you."