The Only You / There is No One Like You [Requested]

66

After answering the phone, Chen Yi realized that the room was a little too quiet. 

He turned his head and looked towards the sofa. 

Ruan Mian had her back to the window, her head lowered, sitting there motionless, with a few folded items beside her, clothes and a black backpack with an open zipper.

Not knowing what happened, he put away his phone and walked over, but stopped when he was about to get closer, and his eyes fell on the piece of paper Ruan Mian was holding in her hand.

To be more precise, it was his suicide note.

People in their line of work will write a suicide note in advance before each mission, in case something unexpected happens during the mission and it is too late to deal with future matters.

Chen Yi originally placed the suicide note and ring under the pillow in the dormitory. 

Some time ago, he asked Shen Yu to go back and pack some things for him.

Shen Yu conveniently put this among them and took it over.

Chen Yi didn't expect her to see this, just like he didn't want her to know that he was injured at all.

 Although some things are inevitable, knowing it earlier and knowing it later are different.

Before that time comes, Chen Yi doesn't want Ruan Mian to understand and come into contact with these things prematurely.

It may be a very cruel thing for her.

Death is a common thing that everyone has to experience, but when it happens to people around you, it may not be an easy hurdle to overcome.

Chen Yi walked over in silence, then half-crouched in front of Ruan Mian, trying to take the paper out of her hand, "Okay, stop reading."

Ruan Mian didn't let go. 

She squeezed her fingers tightly. 

When she looked at him, her eyes were very red. 

It seemed that she had used a lot of courage to speak, "Isn't that right? If you didn't... this time..."

"No ifs."

Chen Yi interrupted her, pulled the paper out with some force, and folded it again according to the previous crease, "I'm back, this assumption is not valid."

Ruan Mian still clutched the two rings in her hands, and suddenly felt some belated panic and fear in her heart.

When she was studying in the past, she and her tutor participated in several medical projects to aid Africa during the summer.

She heard from people in the team that those MSF doctors would leave a suicide note in advance when they went to some dangerous places, like Those Chinese soldiers who came to Africa to perform missions at that time would leave a few words before they came here.

Ruan Mian thought of what she had said to Chen Yi not long ago after she learned that he was injured. 

She thought she could accept all his emergencies calmly, but when she actually saw the suicide note, Ruan Mian realized that the so-called "I can, I am willing, I accept" are all bluffs.

Just like that time, when they met again in Lorraine, all the calmness and indifference she felt when facing Chen Yi collapsed when he faced life and death.

She couldn't accept the slightest mistake on his part.

"Chen Yi..." 

Ruan Mian cried uncontrollably, her throat seemed to be blocked, and she would be speechless for a while.