Ghost Of You | Yoonmin

oo4

oo4
"they say time heals all wounds, but I've given it time, and my wounds are just as deep as the day I received them," 

_______

YOONGI STUMBLED DOWN THE HALLWAY TOWARDS THE BATHROOM. TRYING HIS HARDEST NOT TO THROW UP ON HIMSELF. His head was throbbing, and the room was spinning all around him. He was going to be sick, he knew it. He shouldn't have gotten drunk in the first place, let alone this drunk, but he felt so broken after saying goodbye to Jungkook this morning. He hated himself for letting the younger see him that way, and after failing to fall asleep, he broke out the bottle of vodka he'd stored in his bedroom dresser, and drank the whole thing. And when he was done with it, sitting hunched over on the couch, the bottle nearly slipping from his fingertips, he got up, and got another. He drank the second bottle dry, and by that point, his body felt numb and he was exhausted. But that's what he wanted. He wanted to numb the pain to the point where he couldn't feel or think, numb it to the point where he could pass out and have a few moments of peace. He knew he'd regret it when he woke up, but he'd worry about it then.

And now, as he shoved his way into his bathroom and collapsed to his knees in front of the toilet, he wished he hadn't. He wished he'd told Jungkook about the other bottles so that he would get rid of them too. Wished he didn't hate himself so much that he thought the only way he could fix it was to drink. Yoongi wished Han were here. He could have kept him company, kept him from fucking up, but Han hadn't returned, and Yoongi thought that he was never going to come back.

He threw up the contents of his stomach, squeezing his eyes shut. His headache seemed to only be getting worse and worse. He felt as if someone was repeatedly hitting him over and over and over again with a hammer and nail. Each throb was worse than the one prior, and at some point between the stench of his sickness, and the pain in his body, Yoongi began to cry because it was too much. He clutched at the porcelain so tightly that his knuckles turned white, sobbing loudly. He was sure he was loud enough that the neighbors could hear him, but he didn't care. He couldn't help it. He had been loud enough to wake Holly who came rushing into the bathroom as quickly as his tiny paws could carry him and nudged Yoongi's foot with his snout, which only made him cry harder.

He was still crying as he tried to push himself off the ground. It was no use. He could feel the nausea washing over him again as he sank back to his knees and threw up again. Holly whined, but Yoongi didn't have it in him to acknowledge his dog as he choked and gasped for air. It was too much for him. He'd had to remain there for a little while longer, just until his stomach settled down.

It was another fifteen minutes before Yoongi could move again. He'd thrown up two more times, crying the entire time because of how sick he felt, and how much pain he was in. His chest was tight, as was his throat. He felt as if he couldn't breath, and the pain in his head was too much. He couldn't find the strength to move half a foot in front of him to get painkillers. He didn't trust himself to take them, because he didn't believe they'd stay down. But at some point, he couldn't stay on the floor. His knees hurt, they'd been bent underneath him, and they were starting to cramp. He gripped the edge of the sink and pulled himself up, flushing the toilet in the process. He then stood over the sink long enough to brush his teeth. Holly barked at Yoongi, making him wince. The headache hadn't gone down. Holly barked again and Yoongi whimpered in pain.

The sounds of dogs barking in the distance could be heard if he listened hard enough. It was hard to tell which direction they were coming from though. His head hurt so much, and did the rest of his body. Everything hurt if he was being honest with himself. He was also exhausted. He wanted to sleep. Yeah, sleep sounded great right about now. Maybe if he closed his eyes....