Ghost Of You | Yoonmin

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"it's time,"

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JUNGKOOK TUGGED AT THE HEMS OF HIS SWEATER'S SLEEVES. He hadn't taken it off since Yoongi gave it to him, the strong scent of Han's cologne still there. Yoongi probably hadn't touched this particular sweater in years and if he had, he must have a bottle of Han's cologne lying around. If that was the case, he wondered what it would take for Yoongi to spray some of his shirts.

Standing quietly outside of Yoongi's apartment, Jungkook mentally prepared himself to go inside. Over the course of three years, Jungkook had received a few phone calls from Yoongi like the one he had received early this morning; where Yoongi was sobbing and in such a hysterical state, telling him how he needed help, or that it was all becoming too much for him. Jungkook hated getting those calls, because of how helpless he felt. He would wait, almost every night in anticipation for one of those calls. And when they came, panic filled him, because the first few times had not ended well. Yoongi had been in a really dark place after the accident.

The first time Yoongi had called him like that was a few months after the accident. Jungkook could barely understand Yoongi through his tears and gasps for breath. He was in hysterics, coughing from crying too much and tripping over his words. Jungkook could hear Holly barking in the background, but it was barely audible over Yoongi's sobs. He caught phrases like "miss him," and "don't feel good," but the one that stood out the most was the very broken "I'm so sorry Jungkook," Yoongi had then ended the call abruptly, instilling a fear in Jungkook. He'd just lost his brother, he wasn't ready to lose Yoongi either.

When he stumbled across the older, almost an hour later - traffic had been terrible that night, and he and his mother cursed the whole ride there, hoping that they might not be too late - Yoongi was lying face down in his bathroom. There was a sticky pool of blood seeping from the gash in his forehead, and an empty bottle of pills next to him. There were several pills scattered across the bathroom floor, they must have spilled when he'd slipped and hit his head on the edge of the sink. Jungkook lost it. While his mother called for an ambulance, Jungkook did his best to revive the older. He sat by his side, cradling Yoongi's head in his lap and trying to get him to wake up, while also attempting to stop the bleeding. He refused to leave Yoongi once the paramedics arrived, and had stayed next to him for the entire two weeks that it took for him to wake up. Jungkook had never felt so relieved in his whole life.

He gave it to Yoongi once he woke up though. Jungkook screamed at him, and cried, then screamed a little once and when he was done, Yoongi started crying, apologizing to the younger over and over and over again. Yoongi felt guilty for putting the younger in such a position. It was bad enough that he'd had to witness him in the hospital once, but to put him through that again? He knew he fucked up, but he'd been in such a dark place lately, he just wanted the pain to end.

The second time was much worse, and again, Jungkook had been cutting it a little too close for comfort. Yoongi had been so drunk that night, and had gotten a hold of a razor. There was a lot more blood that time, and Jungkook firmly believed that Yoongi was gone.

The third time that it happened, Jungkook had managed to keep Yoongi on the phone long enough until he reached his side. He learned from the first two not to let Yoongi hang up the phone on him. As long as Yoongi was talking, he was alive, and as long as he was alive, Jungkook could breathe easy. When he arrived, Yoongi latched onto him, and never let go. He was crying so hard, Jungkook thought he was going to make himself sick. Jungkook held onto him tightly as they sat on the floor of his living room, telling him how much he loved him, and that he wasn't going anywhere. Jungkook told him everything was going to be okay, and that he just needed to take deep breaths. Jungkook was scared to let go of him, afraid that letting go might mean losing him.