Mythical

87. Numb

I stood under the shower, my tears blending with the water trickling down my hair. I wanted to feel, and I knew exactly how to trigger feelings. I couldn't be numb, it was torture. My mind shut down my emotions after I was bombarded with a variety of them in excess. I got overwhelmed and passed out. This happened when I was helping Jin lay the table. Yoongi had picked me up before the plate shattered on contact with the ground, preventing me from getting injured.

It had been three days since the visit. Four since the death of my family.

I stepped out of the shower, tying the robe around my waist after wearing my underwear. I stepped out into Namjoon and Hoseok's shared room. They thought it would be best if I stayed with the two people who were best at medicine in the clan.

I walked out with a pout, making my way to my two mates who were using their phones. I straddled Namjoon the way I did to Jin in Pitcairn islands, earning a surprised look from him.

"Hey bunny. Do you need anything?" he asked.

"I..." I trailed off. If I asked him what I was going to ask, I was practically pressurizing him. I didn't want to do that and trigger his memories. "Nothing." I got off his lap and went to my room to change.

I went back to their room, taking my place on the side of the bed, letting Hoseok sleep in the middle. I lay behind him and hugged him, wrapping around him like a Koala. I deeply inhaled his scent. They cut the trip short. We were leaving the next day. Fortunately, I never unpacked, so I didn't have much to pack.

"Hey Bubble. How are you feeling?" Hoseok asked.

"M' alright," I mumbled.

No, I wasn't.

-

"Jungkook!" Gina exclaimed, running over to me and embracing me. Her mother-like touch simply made me melt in her arms and cry into her shoulder. She froze when she felt my tears seep through her shirt. "Sweetie, what's wrong?"

"M-mom and H-hyung... d-dead," I cried into her shirt. She cooed, rubbing my back and whispering sweet nothings to me.

"I'm so sorry, honey. I know how much you love them," she comforted. "How long has it been since you ate?"

"Been two days. I wasn't hungry," I mumbled. She pulled into the kitchen.

"I'll make some soup for you. Drink as much as you can," she said, whipping ingredients out. I simply watched her cook, feeling that same warmth in my chest that I used to feel when my mom did the same for me when I used to be sick. Gina has been a mother-figure to me since I met her. But Jin is sending her on a dangerous mission. There was a higher chance of her dying than coming back.

"Gina... Are you taking that undercover mission?" I asked.

"No. I can't leave my mate," she said. Then she glanced at me. "Or you."

-

I stayed in my room for the rest of the day. I didn't budge when Gina tried to coax me to leave the bedroom. I stayed in the same curled up position on my bed, only leaving if I needed the bathroom. It was not like I had anything else to do anyway, it wouldn't make a difference.

I slept a lot, ate less, filled my stomach with water until it hurt. I was exhausted mentally and physically. I couldn't bring myself to go to the bathroom. I kept replaying the video in my head, then the memories.

"People die all the time. Why am I acting like a depressed cup of coffee?" I mumbled to myself. "It surprisingly hurts less than when dad died. Maybe the first death is what hurts the most."

"Jungkookie..." Taehyung said, trailing off as he opened the door to my room. He came over to me and lay on top of me, kissing my exposed left cheek over and over. "How are you feeling, love?"

"It hurts less," I started. "... than when dad died. I don't know what I'm feeling." I slowly turned over on my back, making sure to not let Taehyung fall off me. I looked up at him with blank eyes. He leaned down and kissed my cheek.

"Take your time, little one. You're allowed to grieve," he said. "And we know that you need to focus on yourself right now, so you do that. But let us take care of you physically. Like eating, setting your body clock, encouraging you to do some activity, etc."

"Okay..." I said in a soft voice.

"Okay. Now, let's get some light food in you," he said. I nodded. I reluctantly got up from bed and followed Taehyung to the dining room.

"I'm not very hungry," I mumbled. I went over to Jin, who was laying the table, and hugged him from behind. I inhaled his scent. "Seokjinnie!"

Seokjin turned in my hold around his waist and looked at me with a soft look. "Hey Bambi," he said, kissing my forehead.

I basked in the comforting scent he was releasing. "You're part-werewolf, right?" I asked.

"Part wolf," he corrected.

"Does that mean you can morph into a wolf?" I asked.

"I don't know. I never tried. Hyungsik trained my vampire side, but I never learned anything about the wolf side. I think the wolf is dormant," he responded.

(To be clear: Jin's DID has nothing to do with him being a hybrid. DID is dependent on childhood trauma. The alters are created at a young age.)

"Why do you have different eye colors every time you front, and Jin doesn't?" I asked, resting my head on his shoulder and burying my nose in his neck.

"That's the effect of being supernatural and having DID (This is fictitious). I'm not sure why they're different though," he explained. I hummed against his neck.

"Seokjin, I want to feel," I murmured. "I'm not able to feel."

"What do you want to feel, Doe?" Yoongi asked, hugging me from behind. Since I grew taller than him, his height reached my shoulders.

"I..." I trailed off when my mind started screaming at me to stop. "Nothing." I pulled away from the two and took a seat.

"Jungkook," Seokjin called out. He and Yoongi sat down on either side of me. They looked at me intently. "What were you asking?"

"Nothing, it's fine," I said, shaking my head.

"Doe," Yoongi said, a tone of gentleness in his voice. "How can we help you?" His hand was placed on my thigh, very close to my crotch. He didn't notice, he was too worried to notice.

"I'll ask after dinner," I responded. They hesitated but nodded.

"Yah! Namjoon watch the plate!" We heard Hoseok yell. Following that, was a loud crash.

"Hoseok!" We could hear Namjoon and Jimin whine simultaneously as they walked into the dining room. Hoseok was pulling the two by their ears.

"These two are playing around with plates," Hoseok explained. "You already broke one. What if you broke another one?"

"We're vampires, we don't get hurt easily," Jimin said, pouting. "And we heal easily."

"What about Jungkook, huh? You brats," Hoseok said, letting go of them. They sulked as Hoseok instructed them where to sit.